right now I want to die n can’t sleep to stop thinking but now I have thought bout it were all scared of wat we are cable of killing ourself everyone is waiting for a sign or someone to pull them out of da darkness if dat wasn’t da case we wouldn’t have been on dis sight we would have already killed ourselfs but everyone is still scared wanting to enjoy da world like most people do. Or waiting for something to happen to push u over the edge and finally kill ourselfs making sure we have a good reason for our own death. We ask ourselfs each day why I’m I still here but we still go on hurting n bringing everything thing in our path down. Why is that I am only 14 and I am wondering why do I feel like this? Most 14 year olds r excited about going to high school have the little crushes and stuff. But me i don’t care if I go to high school and u want to know who my crushes are right now drugs n I am plan on getting them. I want all the hard drugs n achohol that can knock me make me feel happy for once make me feel normal. I guess that’s not the way to go about it finding happiness o well I tried smiling when I am around people most of them I don’t even like including family. I rather be by myself so I won’t have to get excited to pretend to be happy for someone when I really don’t a fuck but I still do it to make them have there moments. I keeping wondering when am I going to have my moment.
6 comments
Hi
If you go on to drugs then that is the total screw up, you won´t be able to get out of it and you will think of these times now as paradise compared to finding yourself hooked on drugs. Talk to the counselor, a shrink or anyone who is an expert in the field. That fix is much better than ressorting to drugs.
I understand that you are so upset that drugs seem the only way but they aint, they will take of you the last energy available.
You dont even mention why you are feeling like that, what unchained it-
O
Some things can’t be said
You can vent and talk about EVERYTHING and you won’t be judged.
tired_wanderer@yahoo.com
tired.wanderer@yahoo.com
you know what…to tell you the honest truth, i think just like you do. i want to get so fucked up on the hardest shit i can get my hands on so that i can just sit there and 1.pass out or 2.not feel anything. we both know its a bad idea and i dont think im helping but thats not my reason for typing this. i just wanted to let you know that there is people out here like you, that feel the same, and you arent alone. i dont know what youre going through and you dont know the same for me, but i felt like i should comment your story because you remind me of me. it weirded me out that someone thought the same thing as me, but i guess its a good thing because i can relate to you and its nice. im not encouraging you to do drugs and im not saying not to either. its totally youre choice. good luck <3
hey, look i no exactly what ur going through, i was there i was the same 14 yr old girl that nearly did go, im 16 now two years later things did change for me n i got wat i wanted a best friend to stay by my side n i guess ive still got her however things arnt all great between us at the moment nothing in my life is good rite now its all going down the drain again and thats how it first started off. my point is stay with it things do get better and i would definitly not pick up the drugs or the suicide it ruins ur life trust me ive overdosed myself, and up untill 11 months ago i was using self harm to let my feelings out. i wouldent do it if i were u as much as u dont wnt to b around. but just remember wat i learnt and that is that theres always atleast someone out there who loves u.