Suicide(v)-The deliberate taking of ones own life.Â
I sit in the shadows hoping for someone to notice me. Hoping that someone will see the girl whose world spins all too fast. My so called best friends watch me and see the darkness that haunts me, they sit back as i crawl deeper into my shell. To them it is a joke, it is hilarious to them how often i fall apart. They see my bitterness as a mere form of entertainment.Â
I laugh along as if my darkness is a choice as if i choose this hate, this heart wrenching pain, i pretend that its all a part of who i want to be, when in reality i wish i could be them. I wish i could laugh, and mean it. I wish i could become the girls everyone envies but i am just the sad friend that follows them around.Â
I am the silence in the halls, the screams in the wind, the whispers in the night.
5 comments
“…..but i am just the sad friend that follows them around.”
But you are the hero of your life!
Many of us here have this feeling of disconnection and in the past there’ve been many others who have felt the same. There have always been many genius people who have thought differently from others. They were right but the fucking stupid majority of their time couldnt understand the truth of their ideas so they would become isolated, marginalized and even severely punished for their bright ideas which later chaned the world. If you think you are right, do not care abt others and keep going in your own path.
I can relate to how your friends thinks everything is a joke, my friend is the same way. I often times pretend that this too is what I want, but it’s not. I just want to be happy as well. I have a much easier time, around other people, to just pretend that I’m okay, and not let them know that I am feeling the way I am. Do your friends know that you aren’t happy?
Dear Catey
Can you see how many people are caring about you? I hope you read all these comments before making any decision.
You think your alone? Read the comments. Everyone here is just sort of like you in one or another. We’re all just hurt. Your not alone…Your not standing there by yourself. We all care. We understand. Watch what you do and don’t let them get the best of you.