So I guess a lot of people of this site are dead now?  I’ve been going over a large number of suicide notes on here and my hearts bleeds when I read them, and  I noticed that the majority of them don’t seem to have come back on even though some well wishers plead with them no to go though with it. So I guess they went ahead and killed themselves. It has been haunting me all night knowing that I have been reading a dead persons thoughts in their last hours or days, could they have been stopped I wonder, if someone said the right thing? Did the right thing? It hurts me so much. Last night I read some recent suicide notes and other than one of them, the ones who’s post it was didn’t respond to any well wishers or offers of help and I felt haunted by the fact that I want so bad to say something but I’m scared that I will say the wrong thing, I mean what can I say to someone who feels this way? I have felt some awful and dark times in my life but not anything that bad so I cant really tell them that I really understand that would be a lie, and I cant tell them that there is a reason to be alive when thats not their take on the situation and Im sure they dont turn to suicide quickly or without trying hard to find hope in something first. What can I do? I really want to reach out but I dont want to make anyone worse. I feel so so sad and useless. It sounds so goofy but when anyone in my life feels bad I do their makeup for them or give them a massage but Im reckon to someone that feels through with life doesnt need a massage or a makeover. I have nothing to offer someone in desperate need but I want to so bad. Really all I want to offer them a sincere and true heartfelt cuddle and even is that didnt stop them from killing themselves maybe it would show them that there is still some love left in the world. or am I just being a dumb b1tch? I feel so haunted by all this and I dont know what to do.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
5 comments
Hi Poppyseeds, there’s nothing wrong with how you’re feeling and you’re a smart girl to give this so much thought before running away with your own emotions and risking saying the wrong thing. I’m not sure that saying the ‘wrong thing’ is a big factor, most people expect that most others will not really understand how they feel and so I doubt it makes them feel any worse than they already do, granted it also doesn’t make them feel better and so you are very wise and caring to consider this so much. I am one of those ‘sad people’ poppyseed and I certainly wouldn’t take offense to someone such as you offering me a ‘sincere and true heartfelt cuddle’ I might not be in a situation to take it, and it wouldn’t ‘save me’ either, but it would show me that there are sincere souls left in the world.
Well it’s a damn site better than telling someone in their moments of despair that they ‘got over it’ most people on their knees just think ‘good for you!’ I personally find that a bit insulting tho I realise they are only trying to help but in most cases that just doesn’t help. I’d rather be offered a cuddle than some ‘see the sunshine’ talk – they wouldn’t tell a blind person to ‘see the sea’ !
Poppyseed:)
There are many of us who accidently or perhaps intentionally came on this site. Even so, you cannot help but read these stories and want to help or reach out to those persons who are desperately hurting. You are such a doll by the way for caring. I love when people such as yourselves enter this site, true, heartful, generous, sincere, GENUINE people. There is always a risk of saying the wrong things that perhaps can offend someone and make things worst. But judging from your letter my dear, I can’t help but feel sincerity and love flowing through your post. We here on this site who are going through the motions of our problems could use someone as kindhearted as you. Even so, as certain as I am that pink404 and I both can hear (not literally) the sincerity in your writing, I am certain that others here will be able to also and would deeply appreciate it. So please poppyseed, do offer encouraging words my dear:). You are always welcomed:) May peace be with you beautiful:)
Thanks guys for that, I was scared that people would tell me to sod off and play with my hair or something it means a lot, thank you, your words are so sweet and reassuring. You’re my new friends 🙂
Pink404, I just read your other post about that man Splinter and I am crying my eyes out here. Life is making me feel so useless, I have so much to give I know I do but I feel trapped. I don’t know what’s happening to me but I can’t help but think that there is a reason I stumbled upon this site and it is affecting me so much, I want to help in any way I can.
I feel suicidal and there’s nothing anyone can say that is ‘right’ but I can tell you what I would consider ‘wrong’ if it helps? Like for instance, I have spoken with s few people in my life and told them how I feel and even though they deeply sympathize, they seem to think that telling me they’ve been there and one that and now they’re wearing a sunshiney t-shirt to prove it, is just really annoying! Or when people try to make you find happiness in what makes THEM happy, people tend to do that do, and it can actually make me feel worse and even more alone than i thought I was in the first place. I wouldn’t expect anyone to ever say the exact right thing and fully understand (although that’s what we wish for!) but someone just being sweet and considerate of how you’re feeling is help and maybe offering to chat with you if you need it – I could have done with a chat last night but I didn’t find this site until today 🙂
You sound very sweet and genuine poppyseed x