I’am a 16 year old boy who given up hope but cant get over the hump to just end it. When it comes to genes well lets just say i got the short end of the stick I’am 4 ‘8″ going into junior year have diabedes which no one in my family has and out of all my cousins and brothers and sisters even before i knew i had diabedes i ate the best always would choose an apple over candy and whole grain v white yet still 146 pounds . i constantly am bullied and harassed in school am a b student and really got nothing going for me. My dad pretty much has taken away most joyful things in my life after i got a sponsorship for paintball i wasnt allowed to play because a co-workers son broke his arm playing. Yet everybody always says “Theres always tommorow” or “You have just hit a rough patch”. Tommorow and generally the future looks like shit for me. I missed most of the 4th quarter of last year after multiple half ass suicide attempts i was put into a childrens hospital where basically they just make sure you dont kill yourself when your in there and drug you so your a zombie pretty much. All of this combined with the fact that general caringness for other people sets you back in a modern day society is garbage, I went to haiti to help with relief and my teacher failed me for a project that was assighned the day of me leaving. This summer i have basically went to the gym with no results and delved deep into the realm of my mind scary what your brain can come up with. I think the only reason i wont kill myself is how sad my mom and little brother would be. yet humanity has doomed itself and have really let all of us fall into routines of locked in wages and just doing what authority tells us so if i dont end it for myself one goverment will for me
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forgot to add in orig post but i remember a hospital employee saying that the world only cares if your a threat to yourself or others that just hit me and that i think is generally true for todays society idk if anyone else agrees with me
Of course I agree with you JimBodk, you a merely an instrument in this world as soon as your birth certificate was stamped (by an illegally functioning authority). Which is why, even when you are unwilling for whatever reason to be a mere instrument, you are forced to with by drugs or by force.
You feel this way because it is natural, you are in tune with your true sense and are not coping with the slavery that binds you. It proves you are not a robot, and you are not stupid. Be proud of how you feel. But only you know what you must do about it. Act, or give up, any in-between is for the living dead. Xx
Yup and if you do not help the machine that is modern day society you get drugs that make you feel happy so you can be a mindless robot i really like an idea posted by lissypepper about a site people who arent blinded and brainwashed who dont want to give up. We should call the site the alternative or something along those lines if we commit suicide society frowns upon us because we just didnt have the strength, No its because we are not blinded and yet great souls fall every day such as Splinter may he r.i.p. Everybody is a great soul yet some authority of nearly evil makes you work to fund their ideals that benefit only them and destroy billions yet the world goes on and souls as are’s fall divided yet if we band well united we stand. Zx