Afterwards….

I too suffer from depression….Four years ago I attempted to take my own life after finding out that my husband of 8 years had been having an affair and several other aspects of my life were also falling apart. I tried 3 different times to end my life (the first 2 times only being superficial attempts) and finally almost succeeded when I took an entire package of sleeping pills….I was found before the end however and rushed to the hospital where I faded in and out of conciousness for about 20 hours….It was horrible….I’m not religious, but I now believe in hell. All of my nightmares happened at once during those 20 hours and when I finally woke up I wasn’t really sure what was real and what wasn’t… Luckily, my family helped me through my problems and now, four years later, I am able to tell you all about it….that it IS NOT better on the other side!!!! Go see a doctor, tell them that your scared of hurting yourself, hell, tell them to put you on some awesome antidepressants, because you DO NOT want to go where I went….I thought my life was over, and to some extent it was….I lost almost everything that I had worked so very hard to accumulate, and I almost lost my husband and children….but I made it thru and now things are better than they ever were before….I wont lie, Im not happy every day…but I dont cry all the time anymore….I dont fantasize about dying….I dont stay up late watching movies of happier times or look at pictures and sob….Im ok and if you get help, you can be too…..