Im 17 and completly lost. My birthday isnt too far. My life isnt as hard as others might have it. Everythin in it is fine, but myself. I dont have a clue to why I often feel so alone and helpless. Even in the days that I wake up happy and feeling great: behind everything im feeling overhelmed. Im very emotional but I try my beat to control it. Ive overdose twice in my life but have failed only to make myself look stupid. I dont have many friends but the few I have i am grateful for. They know of my atempts to kill myself and try to auppoet me in any way possible. Every night I cry myself to sleep hopping and praying for some guidances, because I know others have it worse. Im confused and not sure what to do. My life isnt hell but having a beating heart is a bit hard to comprehen. Sry im not to great with my words as well as getting out how I feel. This is my first post….. But im considering havin my last birthday.
3 comments
Don’t worry about communicating; you already made your feelings really clear..
I just want to clarify… ODing doesn’t make you look stupid. It’s just a tell-tale sign of a greater problem. If that’s what you were aiming for, then you’re right; it just means you need help like everybody else, but in a different way..
A lot of people go what you go through. You don’t need to have a tragic life story to feel entitled to depression. In fact, it’s unwanted and many people suffer from it irregularly- sometimes without much of a reason. Don’t think less of yourself just because you hear people with worse stories.
Everybody has good and bad days. “You can’t enjoy sunshine without a little rain,” as they say. The intensity of your feelings, though, is also really relevant.
You pray for guidance, but what you really need to do is go out and find it- help from someone. I know this sounds like advice out of some afterschool special, but it’s true. Finding a school counselor, a therapist- somebody can make all the difference. It sounds like you really just need someone to listen, and should you need treatment, they can help you, too.
Before you decide to take your life, just remember that…
1.) You can overcome anything if you really try..
2.) There are people around you that care, despite what you may think..
3.) Sometimes, we don’t find answers until we’re in our darket hour. When we finally do hit rock bottom, there’s only one way to go from there. Up.
4.) There are so many people out there that are willing to help. You just have to go out and seek it.
I hope you can overcome the feelings you’re describing. No one deserves to live like this. And furthermore, your life is JUST beginning; you’re not even in the prime of your life. You have SO much to look forward to- that I promise you. Just give it a chance. Please.
I wish you the best of luck and hope you find your way.
Dan
i think you worded it perfectly. you just worde how i feel, just i wouldnt know to write it like that so thanks! except i havnt OD’d, and i dont have supportive friends, but i totally know what you mean with how my life isnt even that bad but for some reason i just hate myself every day
ps. it was my 17th birthday yesterday and i contemplated killing myself at 12am, and seriously ws considering it for at least 3 weeks before my birthday, but i didnt have a good plan, and im glad i didnt, because there were tmes yesterday where i thought ‘FUCK why am i here, i want to fucking die’ but then there were more times yesterday where i thought ‘man im glad i didnt kill myself because im having fun!!’
just consider that…
and i really like what that other guy said… “You can’t enjoy sunshine without a little rain,†kudos.
This post makes me very emotional myself. One thing you need to know now is that so many of us feel like its the end of the line, especially at seventeen, I have had thoughts about death especially when I have been extremely upset and felt helpless. What you need to do is let that pass, let those feelings go, no matter how helpless you feel everyone has their strengths and weaknesses.
You gotta find the things you enjoy and the things you are good and adapt them into your everyday life for example writing stories or playing a sport with some friends. These things are helpful because they can weaken your thoughts about suicide and it is also an ideal way to let out your feelings, especially writing. Alot of people that want to do it for real as well just go ahead and do it without thinking and sometimes they don’t really mean to do it but they go through it anyway and succeed, you are crying for help here and you may find if you sat down one night and attempted to you would be too scared to go through with it.
Suicide aswell is a selfish act, my mother told me this, from a mothers point of view to kill yourself would be to kill your entire family aswell, to destroy them, they would be devastated to be celebrating your birthday one day then celebrating your life the next. It is not fair to do this even when there is no valid reason, no real valid reason, say you murdered someone then that would be a valid reason to end your own life for abusing someone elses. But no you have potential to grow up and live a better life, you may feel helpless now like most teenagers but you have your whole life ahead of you to meet someone grand and make your dreams come true.
Achieving your dreams and living life may take effort and may require working hard but it is worth it and you need to give life a chance, as I said you are young, too young aswell to be thinking about ending your short life. Do you want to go down in people’s memories as a person who achieved great things and lived a full life or a kid who attempted to live their life but gave up living their life and trying to achieve their dreams.
Please listen to our advice, because we are helping you here, you have people that love you and care about you and if you need reminding that they love you then spend some time with them.
Give yourself a chance to live a life, this will not be the last birthday of yours, it will be the last birthday before you start to make a big change in your life and try to live it to the full. You are a teenager you have every right to have these feelings and best to talk to those close to you instead of people on here because that way your family and loved ones will know how you are feeling and will do what it takes to help fix you back up again.
Please listen to me as I have experienced this myself, be strong and I hope and pray (even though I am not religious) that you will be ok and make it through this. Sorry if this is long I am only trying to help this is why I’m here.
Sapphire x