Letter from a Reject.

  October 24th, 2010 by silver

Dear Sir, do you see how tough I am?
I swallowed all these pills and was barely fazed.
Took a match to my skin and told myself it didn’t hurt.
I stopped being me, so I was wondering:
Do you love me yet?

Hello there, do you see how strong I am?
I’m strong like you now;
I learned to block out the cold.
I like to feel the freezing air on my bare arms.
I had no food today or yesterday or the day before,
Because I can be strong without it.
Are you proud?

Dear Sir, I always admired you.
I’m just like you now;
I’ve learned not to let anyone see me.
Not even you.
I was a little girl when I tore out my teeth and
Stuck safety pins through my hands,
Because I was tough enough.
I became someone else, so I’m wondering:
Do you admire me too?

You’ve hardened me well; aren’t you proud?
I’m tough like you now.
I lock myself away just like you, and
I don’t want to talk about love.
The word rolls like vomit in my mouth.

Dear Mr. Fix-It,
I’m the one you can’t fix.
So stay away just like you taught me and
Keep working on perfecting your world.

Look!  See how organized I am?
I’ve made these twenty gashes in a perfect row tonight.
Isn’t it nice?
I knew you’d think so.

Dear Sir,
I’m tough now; do you agree?
Long ago I stopped hoping for your attention.
Maybe you’ll take a short break for once and
Read these lines I wrote for you, but maybe you won’t.
I won’t be too sad this time.
After all, it’s just a letter from a reject.

Processing your request, Please wait....