I am a 49 year old man who has had the worst year of my life. I am suffering from depression and even thou I am getting help it is not working. I see someone every other week and also take two types of depression meds. 2010 has been the worst year of my life. My wife of 13 years left me in June. She was the love of my life. I was so in love with her I would of done anything for her. I never cheated on her. And as time went on she became more pretty to me. I loved her so much and just would look at her and think I was so lucky to have her as my wife. She left me because she did not want to deal with my depression. I have not gotten over her and now it is the end of December. I just lost my job on December 27 and that is the final straw. Nothing I have done this year has brought me a positive response. I could go on for hours but I will not. The pain is so bad I just want to end my life so I do not feel the pain anymore. I am a very scared and confused man. I do not know who to turn to for help. My parents who I love just doe’s not understand what I am going through. My two brothers also do not understand depression. My sister is the only one I can talk to and understand how I feel but that is not enough for me to get better. I do not know who to turn to. I need help or I feel I will end my life to end the pain. Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Mark
5 comments
Being 29 years younger than you, I don’t think I have enough life experience to tell you anything that would work as a solution. All I can say is that I read your post and my heart goes out to you Sir. I just hope you find someone who CAN help you…
Hi Mark,
First, do you need your meds adjusted? Some people need to try several combinations before they find something that works. Can you also see a therapist more than once every two weeks? It sounds like it’s not enough. Is this therapist even helping, or do you need to try someone else? I know when you’re depressed it’s hard to motivate yourself to get these things done, but I think you should try.
Can you just be with the pain as it is, but not make projections that “it will last forever” or “nothing I do will bring me a positive response”? It’s OK to feel pain; It sounds like you are going through a lot of difficult life changes. Maybe also try to avoid feeling like you have to solve everything at once. Baby steps…
I’m happy to hear that you have loving parents and that your sister actually gets what you’re going through. You may not thing that these things are enough to help you get better, but they really can help pull you up toward the light so you can slowly start to appreciate things again.
I really hope you start feeling better.
Hi was it a dog?
Joke Get her back or move on maybe.
Please don’t give up hope.
You don’t believe that you are loved, but you are!!
My son felt hopeless and ended his life last month.
He was only 27.
Reach out for help. It’s the only way.
Your pain is very real, but there are many people
who can help.
Please don’t give up. I couldn’t save him,
maybe you won’t give up and you will, instead,
reach out and tell someone you want to end your life.
There is hope- look for the light and turn away
From darkness.
God bless you and give you peace.