can i have opinons on my writing? im thinking about writing enough stories to publish a book….i wrote one, like 17 printer pages……wanna see it anyone?
~I felt a droplet of water brush the tip of my nose. I looked up and another drop hit my eyelashes. Drop after drop landed on my face. I blinked rapidly to clear my vision and started walking. Water bounced off my hair and beaded as I traveled. Though under trees, I was sopping. My clothing was suctioned to my body in an uncomfortable way. I saw something of a cabin and went to it; an abandoned farmhouse, I went inside for shelter. There was a small rusty barrel in the corner. Near a broken window there was a huge armchair facing out. I walked around to the front of it. In it was just a small pile of leaves; I had a feeling about the leaves though. I parted the pile a bit and saw a flash a black under it. I reached for it and lifted. It was a thin notebook, water damaged with a black cover. I flipped to a random page and saw a small writing. ‘One day I can. One day I will. One day I will follow my dreams. No one can stop me’ was one section; another read, ‘I won’t change for anyone. Take me for who I am or leave me for who I ought to be.’ I studied the page and closed it. I looked through the broken window and noticed the sun peek out from behind an ominous gray cloud. I took a last look around the room and walked through the small door. I didn’t take the notebook, I had the feeling that the owner was going to come back for it; I was right. A young girl peered around the corner of the doorway. She was dressed in rags and covered in dirt. She cautiously walked to the arm chair at the window. She picked up the black notebook and sat down. She opened it and began to write; ‘I can trust, I just never do. I will learn to, I will forgive the world for what it has done to me.’ Night fell and the young girl climbed onto a makeshift bed; it was a thin board with just a thin cotton blanket to keep her warm. Tears leaked from her ducts and she sniffled multiple times. She continued with this until she fell into the state of quietness that we refer to as sleep. The sun blinded her through the spaces between the boards. She rolled over and tumbled from her board; she hit the ground with an empty thud. She slowly rose from the slight pain and walked to the arm chair. She picked up her notebook and walked out the door. She went to her usual rock and sat down. She opened the notebook and wrote. A modest breeze swept around her and lifted her hair from her shoulders. She heard crunching and moved her head to see three teenage boys and a girl laughing as they strolled down the trail. The tallest boy glimpsed the girl and pointed. The others stopped; the girl stepped forward and ventured towards the opening where she sat. The callow girl rose quickly and tried to run; she couldn’t, there were too many sticks and pointed rocks, she owned nothing to protect her feet. Instead the older girl reached her and placed a soft hand on her shoulder. She turned the adolescent in a way that made their eyes meet.
~I watched as three men hung their heads as they walked towards the gallows. They had paid for their crime in jail, why now the gallows? I didn’t get it, people change in the dark, cold bowels of prison; why not try a second chance? It was always this way for me, watch the prisoners come sadly nearer to me; I bag their heads and tie a slipknot as they stand on the platform. I pull the lever, the floor drops, instant death. Depression is what I faced. Killing men for a living, not human nature.
~My eyes flew open. I was dripping in sweat. My breathing was heavy. The bed wrap was squeezing me like a constrictor. I ripped them off and jumped out of my bed. I ran downstairs and out of the front door, onto the porch. For a fraction of a second I paused there, then continued down to the street unto the middle of the road. I reached into my pocket and pulled out its contents; several buttons, some string, my cellular phone, and a black Swiss army knife. I opened the switchblade extension on my knife and just looked at it. I slowly brought it to the left side of my chest. In a swift motion I drove the point into my heart. I collapsed and all my bodily functions ceased. I had never felt so free.
that was my 2nd ever written…..