I have suffered from depression for many years. I find the best way to deal with it is by keeping myself busy and goal-oriented. Since I was 15 I had a career goal, and at the age of 24 I have finally attained it. I watched my friends drop out of school, become institutionalized, commit suicide, and join the military. Instead, I worked at this goal for 9 years. I maintained a decent GPA in college and graduate school. Now I have moved back to my home state and started my dream job. I should be happy, but I can’t stop thinking about how it will end. I don’t want to say anything here that is too detailed…but you get the idea. My job is disappointing, my student loans are through the roof, and I’m straddling the poverty line (with a Master’s Degree). I live in an isolated town of 15,000, where I don’t know anyone besides my coworkers. They are all older with kids and don’t really hang out. I just sit here alone in my sorrow every night. How can I cope?
I must sound like a whiny, ungrateful product of the me generation. There are so many other’s out there with no job and no opportunities. Respond to them before you respond to me. I am thankful for all I have, I just wish I could truly appreciate it. I have loving parent’s on one side of the country, and a girl who cares about me on the other. I’m just stuck here in the middle. Is there some way I can learn to be happy with what I have and stop wishing for something else?
1 comment
AloneinKS,
When you are in an open field of desolate, and 10 miles away is a bare mountain.
One can be absolved by the barren feel of the desolate, and just sit down there with depression.
And many may just start something fresh anew there, by organising a family.
Another may be just focusing on the bare mountain and walk towards it.
And some may just return to their way in.
There are choices, and decisions.
Just don’t be absolved.
In other words, don’t think the unthinkable.
“Back to the future”.
The main character struck gold with a series of successful hits.
And that became his peak. And then came parkinson’s.
It’s like people falling ill so quickly after retirement, and probably death.
Just never ever name or call it your peak !
Success and medals just define a boundary.
And life is best treated as a process.