ive been wanting to try suicide, but i kno that it would ruin my families lives, i often think about it everyday thinkin of different scenarios of how and where i should do it. i have a best friend/brother that said he would be there for me whenever i needed to talk about it but ive tried and he never is able to listen and sometimes i just dont tell him because im scared of what would happen if i do. everytime im stressed or depressed or if something goes wrong and i just start acting suicidal i cut. i like the way that it makes me feel, the way that i could let all me frustration out into that cut instead of something else. im just trying to find someone that would listen and care instead of someone who wont give a crap. cutting is the only way other then actually doing suicide.