I’m always a failure that’s what every one says. I failed in life. Every thing I held dear to me is now gone. My Grandmother died from lung cancer December 6, 2010 my brithday is December 30, 1987. We had so much planed. we were going to have fun, But I failed her. I feel like I killed her. I failed her. When she was hurting I shrugged it off thinking it was nothing. If I paid attention she might be still here. I lost a lot. I lost my house and all my beloved animals. one of my dogs was put down cause no one wanted her cause she was old. My cat was put down cause she was a outside cat and was 13. My Husky was put in a kill shelter cause I lost my house. I failed them. I’m losing my car and nobody cares. I had to move in with my Mother. Shes always telling me that I’m a failure in life. “worthless peace of shit why cant you do any thing right” or “your a Fucking freeloader who do not care bought any one” shes always calling me stupid, dumb, retarded, A failure to society. I can not find a job cause I never had one cause I was taking care of my grandmother for 5 years since I got out of high school. So I failed in life. whats the point in life any more. I do not have any thing to live for any more it was all taken from me. I suffer from PTSD and severe Chronic depression. and I was ok till now. Grandma made me hole. she said every thing was going to be ok. but its not it never is. I just want to give up. whats the point any more.