I just realized today how messed up I really am.
I get on chat sites and talk to strange old men and show them pictures of me naked and get on web cam with them.
I’ve gave a few of them my number.
I tell them I’ll be there slave and bull shit like that.
The crazy thing is, I’m only 15.
I’m addicted to doing this.
Of guys drulling over me on the web.
To know I’m making guys happy by a picture I send them
Or by a sexy sentence I typed.
I’ve had a couple of them tell me there gonna kidnap me.
I wouldn’t be surprised if that happen.
Good. I wish they would.
they can do whatever they want with me rape me, kill me whatever.
I crave attention from the opposite sex, and I rarely get it in real life.
I’m an internet whore.
And I hope one of these men do come and kidnap me and kill me.
I’m so gone beyond repair.
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6 comments
What do you think made you want attention so badly? What was missing, or what was there in your life that was wrong?
I feel you, girl 🙁
Same with me. I’ve sent a lot of guys over the internet nudes and sexy pics of myself.. in fact I met this guy recently and we’ve been talking about meeting up irl… and him taking my virginity. I realised that before my exit I actually WANT TO be a really rebellious, messed up girl. I’m 16 and don’t want to turn 17 being a “good girl”. I want to smoke, drink, have sex, all of it.
I never get attention in real life. Out of my friends, I’m the ugly girl. All my friends are the girls that get the boys, I get nobody. It’s not even really that I’m extreamly ugly, it’s just that everyone looks better than me. On the internet no one compares to me, and I feel like the most popular girl and prettiest girl there with guys from all over telling me how pretty I am. I don’t get that in real life. I get the exact opposite.
Please don’t do this. There must be something else you can do neverthesame. Tiffany, are you completely mad?
I do not understand
I’d listen to what when is saying….the only person who can really validate you is YOU-not me or any guy…so he pays you a compliment-then you judge yourself cause somewhere along the lines of your upbringing you didn’t get your needs properly met-cause this is not the natural course for someone brought up being loved and cared for. I feel for you. Okay, so you’re doing what you know best and your conscience is letting you know that sending nude pics and carrying on is NOT FULFILLING. Just stop doing it, and find something that fulfills you. Everyone is seeking some kind of fame….you are the constant in your life and whether or not your friends are getting male attention…whoopie!…..you are what matters. …if you tell yourself you’re the ugly one …topped with all the negativity you can muster…ya, it’s true cause you’re buying into it and believing it. A change of attitude and perspective about yourself will do wonders. Talk to a counsellor. At 15, you don’t have enough information about what you need. You are worth far more than you could possibly know, and I don’t need to have ever met you to know this….
That’s the thing though. I have so low confidence, that the only way I get any sort of self esteem is from other people telling me. When I look in the mirror, I hate what I see. I don’t even like looking in mirrors anymore, because I feel as if I will never compare to everyone else. My standards of myself are already low. The only way they get higher, is from other people. People in real life rarely tell me I’m pretty. The most attention I get is on the internet. I know it’s stupid, but to a degree I don’t even care. I don’t want to live anyways, so I hope one of them comes and kills me. I’m just sick of never being good enough for myself or other people.