I have goals, I have people, I’m about to graduate from college with good grades and then I’ll launch off into a career that could be rewarding. Â But I don’t do these things except for some vague idea of the future and in order to survive. I don’t cry often, I don’t despair. Â I’m apathetic toward nearly everything and I don’t think I can ever be happy because people out there don’t enjoy me or relate to me at all. Â They don’t share any of my interests, they’re never really looking forward to seeing me. Â They won’t come out of nowhere to say “hello” and smile at me. Â My friends don’t contact me, I contact them, then we spend time together, great. Â But really, if I didn’t get out there, no one would ever bother to find me. I know I’m loved by a couple nice people out there, they’re close to me. Â They don’t make me feel loved, though. Â I hear it from them, but no matter how many times they say it, I never actually see or feel love. Â I don’t feel close to anyone, friends, family, classmates, coworkers, nobody, they’re all distant and foreign and I don’t think they really know me or care about me and I’m doubtful that anyone will ever care about me.