i discovered this site all of 5 mintues ago, and i signed up. Im not sure why. Out of impulse, out of need, or maybe out of sheer desperation. this thing’s called the ‘suicide project’ . does that mean that someone’s actually trying to help us? someone actually cares / hmm. i bet they too are lying. Becasue no body cares. the word it’self is overrated. it’s safe to say i’ve forgotten the meaning of the word care. you may wonder why, or maybe, jsut maybe like everyone else, you dont care, therefor you dont wonder. however, im doing this for me, so i’ll say it any way. what was i going to say? i forgot..
i cried tonight. because im tired, exhausted. it’s been a while now that i just dont care. boy do i hate that word.
” i care sophie, i care ” no you don’t, noobody cares. and why should they ? who the hell am i to them ?
I don’t care, why should you.
Im so tired. Im 16 and life exhausts me. isn’t that sad. isnt that pathetic ?
i no longer have the energy to care. infact, i no longer have the enegry to do much. I go to the most expensive school in pakistan, and all this money is being spent on me because apparently im CARED for. but i dont want it. i don’t want their money. there pitty or sympathy. No thank you, i’ve had enough charity to last me a life time.
To be perfectly honest with whoever it is reading this, i don’t know why im writing here. i think if anyone REALLY wanted to die, they wouldnt suscribe to this website, they’d jsut kill themselves and get it over with.They wouldn’t feel the need to publicise why they want to die, and how they plan on going about it. they’d just do it. Im doing it becasue i don’t trust myself, i dont feel safe in my own skin. isn’t that a strange thought ? well anyway i don’t. And i do think i will kill myself. soon enough. but im writing here so if anyone who ‘cares’ Â wants to find out why i did it, maybe they’ll end up going through my laptop history, see the sites i’ve been going on, and hopefully they’ll end up here. then they’ll know why i did it. why am i so self obsessed ? Becasue im a *****.
It’s true; death is easy. Life is harder.
-Ess
10 comments
I think you care because you wrote this. If you didn’t, you would’ve spent your free time on something else. If you really didn’t care at all, you would’ve probably stared at the ceiling or sky for hours on end and ignored every stimulus around you, even if it’s a guy with a gun to your head.
Yeah, life’s hard, but you seem to have the energy to feel angry and unsure, so take that and use it in your life’s struggle. When something in your life gives you shit, use your energy to push back and kick it’s ass.
someone replied ? how strange. how nice .
I wrote this because im tired of doing exactly that. im tired of staring at the ceiling endlessly, im tired of staring at the sky for hours. Im not angry, and what im unsure about, i dont care enough to question it.
-Ess
if you go on,
feeling blue,
your demise will come,
and it will be soon.
if you think i shouldnt care,
maybe i wont,
but do not kill yourself,
Just Dont.
i know it hurts,
and sorrow pry’s
but dont let it in,
dont die.
love life,
find your passion,
weather it be woodshop,
or fashion.
life is bad
only if you make it,
so just go and smile,
go and be glad…
<3
thats devastating, too much pressure on such a young person. the way the world has been made has just made life to hard for the youth to live..
Grow up -> learn-> get a job -> have kids -> Die?
Whats the point? Why would i want to bring children into this meaningless place, The same thing happens but worse as the world gets more absorbed by the desire to be rich, The thirst for success, The always pulling force of power reigning down, Forgetting about the children, Trying to make themselves richer.
No-one cares about human life anymore, I love you and i love everyone else and i wish i could help you, This planet is fucked up, Im trying to find a way to help everyone. suicide has gone up 64% this year then last year.
People just cant handle it. Parents are destroying the world. trying to get their kids to grow up the way they want them too. Im lucky kinda because my parents are hippies and taught me everything about the world, They showed me how humans have made life hard and how blind everyone is.
Everyone is getting lied too. To every story there is the truth, a lie and the true truth.
We need to fix the world by learning whats wrong and fixing it on a global scale or its just ganna be the same for everyone, My goal is to make everyone open-minded to see what really is going and teach people how to fix it
Bide your time. Practice your skills, be nice to everyone, dont get sucked into anyones traps, Dont be manipulated. Do what they want but make your goals go with it. I dont want to die without doing something, You can handle do it without anyone caring. One day someone will care. i dont want to wait around for someone to care about me but i know one day they will. But the way most kids are going these days its not ganna end up good. i dont know anything but it seems all people want now is love. if people dont want to love me. i dont care. People just seem to hate me, Just because im weird, Now ive discovered everyone is fucking weird. Clinging to whatever makes them forget about why they are here.
Have u ever thought what a god would think about the planet?
It took me 13 years of my life to realise everyone is just atoms and molecules, vibrating at different rates, charged positive or negative.
Every thought is just a certain amount of electrons vibrating at just the right frequency. Influenced by 0,1 ,left and right, up and down, positive and negative, male and female, on,off.
I dont know why i signed up to this sight, i guess i just want to see if people feel the same way i do and the more i look around the more people are searching for a reason to live. I havent found one but my neices are the most beautiful things in the world, I never realised how much power a child has until you study the way the grow up. They almost learn everything the parent knows. subconsciously know things that they have never really learnt
Your right no-one cares. But you should care, who cares what u been cursed with. Think about all your options long and short term, Then figured out what u want most. I know theres probably nothing i can say that will make you feel better. But you are wonderful, just like everyone else your a miracle of science. with the ability to learn Do with your gift with what you want. People are feeble creatures, its doesnt take much to kill yourself. But it takes alot to survive. Surviving is power. Learn what ever you have to. to get to the place you want to be. It you have to do some extreme things to get there. Everything is on the internet. Its your choice. School is the best option, because they have alot of resources.
Meh dont listen to me. Listen to yourself and listen to music like that katy perry song fireworks and what ever else rocks your boat. It will get better and it will get worse. Be prepared for both. Mental and physical.
Fuck everyone. Your the best
Generation Y will save the world
you can survive. you are strong
Dont be blind, be divine
watch your back and dont trust anyone
people change. be prepared
Learn everything
Practise, Practise, Practise
It is hard. That y surviving it is so much better.
Im just waiting for everyone to leave me so no one can be sad.. so im ganna destroy as much evil as i can until then. If you dont want to try i dont blame you the abyss sounds very soothing. But i feel its for judgement and we havent dont enough to be judge
I love you
All my thoughts are with u
-tj
i know how you feel ive tried killing myself b4 i space out for hours just thinking about how worthless i am and how pointless life is
@Nit3fr3ak: I love your realization, goals, and seriously almost everything you wrote above. how old are you if I may know? (I’m nearing 29).
Your words although simple yet speak much needed wisdom especially for many young people here in this website.
I especially got struck when you said “I dont want to die without doing something”. This is very true, and it’s what I’ve been and am planning to practice it more & more in the future.
We have similar goals, that is, to open as many individuals’ minds about what seriously gone wrong, or should I say, the world although more technologically advanced & everything getting so fast-paced progress, yet it seems people are more lost in touch with themselves and LOVE.
Everything just seems so ‘dry’ and even cold, heartless!
If we feel like this, then I believe THAT is our PURPOSE,
a thing that’s WORTH to DO while we’re still alive, breathing on this planet Earth.
No matter how many challenges and fucked-ups the world, people (& society) will try to bring me down, I know that I CAN’T let them bring me down without MY permission!
So just BE, and CONNECT with more & more people. Influence them as much as you can. People’s mind can change, if you’re persistent, they will see it, in one way or another. Trust me.
All you gotta do is to LOVE yourself, keep on DOING what you know at heart to be the rightest, true ones. Learn from experiences. and keep growing more to be the best of Yourself.
If the world won’t care about you, at least know that YOU always care about yourself.
and also the UNIVERSE CARE,…because you’re already born and living now.
You have great wisdom in you, and i do care i truly do, i have great empathy for the people who write on this site, i can cry for them. Perhaps its because i see my self in them, or some need to help others over come the same pain i used to feel, is this some kind of selfish need, perhaps, who can say. But in the end i still feel your pain and run your thoughts around my brain, i want to understand you and your pain to the best i can….keep writing keep talking your words are beautiful
“Be the change you want to see” – Mahatma Gandhi
“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.†– Maria Robinson
“If there is no struggle, there is no progress. Those who profess to favor freedom and yet avoid confrontation, are people who want crops without plowing up the ground; they want rain without thunder and lightning; they want the ocean without the roar of its waters.” ~ Frederick Douglass
“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes…the ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules…You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things… they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.” – Steve jobs
Im 19 and ive seen everything. u can love yourself as much as you want, One day will come, over and over again and make you feel like your nothing.
Ive grown up with suicide. Ive seen how it warps peoples minds.
So many of my friends and family have or tried
There is nothing really to this world
Ive watched my 14 year old sister lose her boyfriend because he hang in thought of his mother, Then watch most of her friends leave her because of all the rumours. She was so sad. She wanted happiness. She just got more rebellous luckily she found the right person and got knocked up or i reckon she would be dead now
I know one day my time will come. That day will be the best. Maybe the darkness inside me will be devoured by the darkness of death. The only thing to look forward too. But wasting life for no reason. Your body is nothing just matter, but the human body is a miracle, a living computer, with the ability to heal and use tools and imagine. Imagination is what separates people if u can imagine something then use 118 elements and 8-9 types of energy to make your imagination come true you can do anything. Im scared of what i know. It will kill me if i dont.
All u can do is figure out how to make life good. Than do what every it takes to make it go that way. all it takes is confidence and planning.
Just figuring out what works is so hard. I just want isolation
It doesnt matter what i do, i need a army to make people realise whats wrong. People dont want to change. people like being Prideful, Greedy, Lustful, Angry, Lazy, Jealous, gluttonous. You cannot stop human nature. Humans need to evolve before anything can happen. They love themselves to much and just need to stop and Focus on the dynamics of life, and stop using fossil fuels, i can give unlimited electricity to the world but i would be killed just like so many people before. I cant do anything as poor as i am. no one cares about people that are nothing.
I just think if im alone from everyone will it be the same
When the time comes the world will get better, but its ganna get alot worse first. give me five years and something will be done. and maybe people will see the light,
Yo troubled…you crack me up. I learned not to believe my feelings or thoughts. I’m not trying to prop you up…you’re valuable and awesome….I project that at everyone/everything (not perfectly mind you)…even when you transition, all the aspects of love I strongly suggest you focus on….even in this nonsense I practice self compassion, kindness….as an exercise it would be interesting for you to focus on something that makes you happy…an animal/pet…person, just focus on it, see what happens.