The more I stroll the street or malls at night, seeing all the humans and couples and happy and dull faces of them,
the more I feel so distanced and separated..
Men in suits always looking oh so professional, with their seemingly chic I-Phones or Blackberry on their ears,
Women often with glamorous necklace, and latest/newest brand of bag,
Ads blaring everywhere you see, hear, and even approached by so-called “Sales girls”,
discount here, buy this, buy that, discount there,
You come out from movie theaters watching perhaps most fantastical & hypnotizing movies/films,
that you even freezes out and don’t feel like you want to get back into Real life,
‘cuz it’s so damn dull, bland,
and everyday repeats and repeats, seemingly without and end,
There are papers to fill,
constant bills to pay: phone bill, water bill, electricity bill, gas bill,
you work from early morning until night,
often in a job you hate too just because 80% humans around you said “well it’s normal! wake up, tough it up! this is Real world you’re living in, hello? helloo! wake upp, stop dreaming!”
And at the end of the day, whether you’re driving inside car, or riding on a train or subway
with perhaps music plugged onto your ears, you sighed:
“is there really any point in all of these madness and boredoms?
when…until when I have to keep going like this??”
“Why can’t I just be FREE ???
Why do I have to live this ‘normal’ life?
And why EVERYBODY seems to be OKAY sticking with it???
What’s with all those faces??
I’m sick and tired seeing all of ’em!
What is this world?
If not full of pains, sufferings,
while at other parts of the world: the often-neglected-and-ignored poverty, war victims, rape victims, pedophile victims,
while at the capitalistic side of the world: men chasing higher status and kissing their boss’ asses, and that’s all their life is all about, while women constantly comparing and fighting for newest brand of clothes, jewelries, bags,..a never-ending pursuit!
Everything just seems so shallow and dull..
Only rarely you feel that shivering feelings of Love, Peace, Touch….things that are basically really still *worth* for living and breathing on this blue Planet..
but too often you wish you’re just disappear away into your dream-world,
or into another multi-universe,
or you wish that cool science-fiction and movies come into reality, like there’s a portal to other world away from this dull & obnoxious world..
I don’t know…
I guess I just hate being normal, and don’t get why most people on the earth seems to stick and enjoy it…
it just makes me feel more isolated, distanced, separated from the “Real world”, and feel depressed..