Well to open with a joke, trying to use this forum makes me want to kill myself! Not sure if you meant that or not..
But on a serious note, just really need somewhere to get shit out before the time comes so where better then a random forum I Googled…
Basically I’ve hit 25 an realised that there is no real point to my life, or anyone’s life for that matter. We are just born, eat, sleep fuck and die.. That’s it. We have no purpose really. We as a race will rape this planet of all resources until forced extinction, and thats it. Fact.
And that gets me thinking, what am I even doing?
I’m not crazy, depressed, suicidal or any of that I just feel nothing. I do not see a point or purpose. Why not just finish now? Same result in the end yeah? I had no choice in the matter but I have a choice now..
Rather then just wade through the day to day blank an alone swallowing the tears why not end it?
I’m am sick and tired of this! When you realize that there is nothing and that we are nothing then you get over the day to day pretty quick.
A saying I made up and now live by till the end. It somes up exactly how I feel and think and actually is the only thing that helps me through the day to day..
“I feel no need to soe my seed,
Or even leave a legacy…
Only the desire to escape my existence..”
Sorry for the ramblings but It does feel better just to put it out there.
The original reason I found this thread was based on life insurance…
I want to make sure mine is as much as possible and that my family WILL get it. That’s the only thing that chokes me up about this, what it will do to my family. But the best I can do is to make sure they have a huge payout and think it was an accident. Not great but the best I can do.
I can sleep at night with this thought. It was an accindent, yeah it will suck for a bit but time heals all wounds wheres as if they new it was by my hand then they would some how think it was there fault and never live it down.
Anyway, thanks for listening or even just being a medium where I can voice my thoughts. Every little bit helps.
Dillon
3 comments
You sound like a nihilistic existentialist. That’s what I am. I’m “leaving” in a short while, myself, but I’m not in any way attempting to hide my actions from others. You’re right, though; there isn’t any point. It’s all make-believe.
I hear you, 2Yearsmax, and I know what you mean (forgive me if I sound too assuming claiming something like that).
I think about the purpose of life a lot – and I also thought that it is so meaningless that there’s no point living. Its not particularly depressing or suicidal, but rather, a matter of philosophy.
Yet, just about 7hours ago I realized something that is true for me, and that is: While I have been moaning about the lack of purpose in life, I have not earnestly sought purpose, and was merely waiting to be enlightened somehow. I have already given up – its like I found no purpose is searching for a purpose (because of a underlying assumption that there is indeed no purpose).
I don’t know if this applies to you too.
But I’m just thinking – what if there actually is a purpose for life that we both are too indifferent to discover? Have you tried seeking? I tried to a relatively marginal extent (but have unfortunately given up as of now).
I posted a bit about this in another thread. Obviously you decide what to do with your free will- to end your life or not. I feel very little purpose and it’s frustrating and I don’t function very well.
Your soul is basically in charge….if you go, your soul says it’s time however that may come. We are born because our soul wants this experience and the guy a lot of people don’t believe in- God, provides it….He’s the source of everything here, believe it or not. Our assessment or judgment of that does not matter as reality unfolds as it does, why…I’m not God and I don’t know…as Einstein said, I only want to know God’s thoughts…the rest are details.
From a Spiritual perspective we are learning and growing. Learning certain life lessons which are individual for everyone and we are learning to love. I believe those are the only two questions you will be asked when you pass. What did you learn?, & How much love did you give/receive. From my experience, love is one of the hardest things to cultivate for many as the few boneheads that control this planet by instilling fear in people. In truth fear does not exist and is perpetuated to keep people asleep and unaware as to who they truly are. If every living person in this world knew their truth, the few that are in power would not be there, we would not go to war, and the world would be a much happier place. The world is changing at a rapid pace at this time and many people’s seemingly normal lives have gone way off course or come to a screeching halt. Mine included. So we’re here to learn, it’s a universe(ity) so to speak. To us things may seem out of control, but from a Spiritual perspective, everything is quite in order. While you’re here, I encourage anyone to cultivate gratitude in their hearts….for everything…the good, the bad, the ugly…hard I know…but that’s part of the lesson for everyone-thinking about it all is overwhelming-just open your heart as best you can by means of whatever inspires you to do so. Cheers!