My mom scheduled me an appointment after telling her that my suicidal thoughts have turned into me full on planning to kill myself. I wish I didn’t tell her, but it just came out. Maybe part of me doesn’t want to die. Maybe in reality I just want to be saved. I’ve been on the same medicine for about 2 and half years now, but now it seems like I need something different, something stronger. I really do deep down hope that I can get better, but really this is it. This is going to be my last attempt to get better. Because I am mentally broken down. And just mentally fed up with life, I don’t want to live in this world anymore, the only reason why I’m still here is because of my family. Thats the only reason why I don’t want to kill myself. Blech, this is just mostly me rambling. pray for me.
3 comments
Can I just ask what your story is? Why do you feel this way? I’m depressed myself but I have nothing to relate to with this other than your emotional state…
What has triggered this feeling of wanting to end it?
Well, In a nut shell, I’ve been depressed for about four-five years. My mom has been depressed so i had to be a mother too her. I’m fifteen now and have extreamly low self worth. I used to get made fun of a lot and get called ugly so it just kind of always stuck with me that I’m never good enough. I crave attention from the opposite sex so much that I act like a whore. I’m addicted to cutting myself. I’ve just never really been happy. again this is just in a nut shell, but yeah.
I think you are absolutely precious and I would love to talk to you. God loves you and cares about you and you can never change that. He would gladly accept your burden, you are his beautiful daughter, and He wants to help, nurture, and protect you. If you want someone to talk to I would love to be your friend. When I was in high school (now in college) I also craved attention from the opposite sex and did so many things that I regret so badly. Thankfully my God saved me and took me out of that way of life and brought me to a safe place where I could be clean again 🙂 I would love to talk to your beautiful self so please email me if you’d like! 🙂
Love,
Adrianne
altera.ad@gmail.com