I need help. I’m fifteen (turning sixteen in a week) and i have nothing to look forward to. i feel so lost and alone.
my sixteenth birthday is in a few days. I have no party planned, no friends to invite, and my brother won’t bother to reschedule an SAT test to come home from boarding school with me.
I feel like such a failure all the time compared to him. I didn’t have a birthday party last year either (yet again, no one to invite) and his friend threw him this outrageous surprise party. i’m spending my birthday with my parents who i can’t stand and i hate myself. I hate myself for being alone. i hate myself for not being pretty or smart or special enough for anyone to love me. i hate myself because i’m too weak to fight the depression i’ve had for years, therapy hasn’t helped.
I’m angry at the world and my family because they pretend i’m fine. my brother is more important than i am. i’m so sick and i can’t stand how disgusting my mind has become. i nwant to hurt people. mostly myself.
i really want to die.
please, please. somebody help me.
6 comments
Hey. If anything dont hurt yourself. God loves you. I know most people will deny it but he does. Your not a failure. Not at all.
Hey how are you doing if u need anyone to talk to I can talk I recently just had a sister commit suicide on Janurary 30th and believe me I feel heart broken inside and I would really like to talk to u if ud like I’m pretty sure there are some things we can relate on and just talk Iv learned latly is easier to talk then to hold all this emotion in
I havent had a Bday Party in years, actually ever since i was 13 years old, im now 20. Theres alot of better ways 2 spend ur time, i personally enjoy watching anime, i find that when im down or the stresses of the world seem overwhelming, that there is nothing better than to jump into an alternate world. Alot of times u can actually get advice from such fictional characters, Well try watching a personal favorite of mine, its called naruto, let me know if you like, I kno u will 🙂
I relate to you so much, its weird. I feel lost and alone too. I also have a brother, my parents love him more than they do me. They always seem to be comparing him to me, saying all my faults and how i should start acting more like him. I wish i was prettier that i could get a boyfriend but sadly i cant. I hate the fact that how my parents ignore my feelings and act how everything is the same, nice and happy. So basically all I’m saying is I’m amazingly the same, I feel how you do. I know what your going through, and im only 14. And iv been through a lot of shit in those fucked up 14 years iv lived. If i can still hang on, you should to. Im not saying im a strong person cause i dont really think i am. Just keep on living k. You’ll see things will better i promise. Know that their are lots of other people out their that feel what you feel. Keep living for those that didnt have the power to do it for themselves and took their lives. Keep living love (:
Hello sweetheart! Email if you want to talk, I would love to talk to your precious self!
Love,
Adrianne
altera.ad@gmail.com
gosh ur so young at 14 im only 20 but at your age you should still be having fun getting in trouble when u can cause at 18 u cant do nothing at get away lol dont be compared to anyone only you know how good you can be and how far u really wanna succeed in your life and since ur so young the sky is the limit for you really =) for all those people who say NO to me or didnt give me a chance id love to prove them wrong nothing better then being Right…..right =)