Ruined my own life

I know it’s hard but make yourself slow down, find something that relaxs you even for a moment and try and think in a better way. Take some time to yourself and just stop. Try and write things and read them back to yourself slowly and think of what you can do now not what you have done. People are not better off without you. It’s that simple, try and make yourself believe it. We all get ourselves into bad places but death is by far the worst option. Try(I know how hard an impossible to seems) to think of a few positive steps you could make, start small and move up. Never be afraid to try as long as you have thought about what your doing first.