Spent the day cleaning the house… I want to make sure things are in order…
Made some brownies and took them to brother for his birthday… he still lives with my parents at age 40…
it is amazing that my family is so blind to how their treatment of me hurts me…. they have no clue how much they are hurting me… they have no idea how bad i am hurting on the inside… no one does… i put the plastic face on each day…. people have noticed that i am grumpy… but they just think i am under a lot of stress at work…. I am very good at compartmentalizing my life….no one knows me…. i only let people see what i think they want to see or can handle.. .. I tried to be honest with my parents…
I really only have a week to get things right then I am out of town for work….. I am not going to leave notes for anyone…..
This site is the only record there will be
3 comments
I know i’m startint to repeat myself but i really hope you dont go through with this. You and everyone here deserves to find peace and happiness in your lives. Death will not give you that. I understand it’s your choice though, i just hope you have thought this through.
I’m here if you want to talk
Take care *Hugs*
it was funny, when I tried to do this in 2005, i was sorry I did it instantly… when it started to kick in.. my wife decided for some reason to tell me that she loved me.. she did not know I had done anything.. she just thought I was in the bedroom crying… at that point I could not do the cruel thing of having her wake up next to dead me… I am not sure if she would have ever recovered… … I have thought about this long and hard… that is why i am going to do it away from home
Can I tell u a story and u can tell me a story. I’d love to hear about u and ur life I’m just a 20 year old kid but I love stories and talking so if u have some spare time I’d love to snatch it up lol 🙂