How am I alive? Is there any ansewer to that, about two years ago i tasted drugs for the first time, more and more each day. Eventually I used so much every day was one long stretched out day, because i stayed up for a month and a half, thats right 45 days. Its strange how 45 is my number, involved in a lot of suicide attempts too. Its a good thing i didnt own a gun. Pills blades and poisonous herbs is all I had.     I will just tell you one for now and more later… I was 14 years old and already using (16 now) amphetamine and every other existing prescription and narcotic existing. My brother and I wanted to “see the other side” so bad we tried suicide. I had a bottle of burisprone, addorall, and resperidone. the burisprone was 150 mg addorall 30 and resperidone 3mg. We split the the burisprone and resperidone in half and took them. every minute of life i felt weaker, my heart hurt more, and my brain died a little faster. I saw things on the “other side” some i didnt like others i did so i tried suicide about 44 more times…
1 comment
45 times???
I don’t normally refer to age but that is a lot of attempts for some one so young. Do you still actually want to die or has it just become an addiction to the visions/halucinations you have? If you use drugs all the time all you are doing is killing your organs which will result in a slow painful death.