Well i’m not sure still for next summer. Probably not as i can never lie to my parents to save my life (or dream of sneaking out i no its sad :(). Lets wait until then, that way i will definately be sure.
I feel really bad, i’m really sorry nikki, and you are better than you think. So far i have never seen a ***** that has a low opinion of his/herself and there are a lot of bitches in my school.
Yeah, people say I’m sorry to be nice, I guess, but it really helps I think… I mean I feel good when someone tells me they are sorry even if they have nothing to be sorry for, if that makes any sense.
I meant sorry for making you wait 3 years for a roadtrip. Also i don’t judge people. Judging people before actually meeting them can cause you to have ideas that are not true, then try to base a conversation on it, and prevent the person from having a true conversation with them.
Maybe they’re just trying to make themselves feel better. Remember hollywood beautiful people are the ones that usually (but not always) get pregnant before marrige
Hollywood people are actually pretty ugly, when you give them a second look. Makeup and camera angles and youch ups make them beautiful and still they aren’t!
sorry i didn’t reply nikki i fell asleep at my laptop…x.x nya… (nya = meow in japanese. also 1 ofmy favorite words. baka is another of my favorite words. in japanese it means idiot :3)
that actually is a great idea. however…i’m not sure if my loved one would appriciate me doing that… he wouldn’t know, but eventually i would be self-guilted into telling him…
Japanese is a hard language to learn. I’ve been attempting for three months and barely know Romaji. I cringe at the thought of learning Hiragana and Kanji.
@nikki…i ‘ll ask first. if he says no then i can’t tho, his word is law, at least to me..^^ i will do anything he asks of me when he asks, i am his loyal servant <3
oh yea nikki…i looked more closely at the map of our state and saw that we are only ONE city away from each other!not a 10 minute drive, but not an hour :3 we should try to meet up at some point
I don’t vwant you hurt!it will be my fault!another thing acaued.another person I hurt.I love everyone I’ve talked to on here!any of you get hurt on my watch its my fault.I love you . Maeliin.you commented on my first post.the first posg I made.you made me happy.I can’t have you hurt.
Sizzors suck.and don’t rely on cutting.my friend does.christal.she’s the girl I love.the one dating the guy.she was in the hospital more timesthen I can count this school vyear.
x.x shoot…i won’t b on till late 2morrow if it’s saturday…
my parents signed me up for robotics club which meets wednesdays and saturdays and any free day we have…gawd i hate it…i used to love it but now…no… anyways it lasts like all day…
@Nikki
As long as you don’t go too deep, cutting is a good coping method. Least to me at least. I’ve done it for three years and not once have I gone to the hospital.
@Maeliin
That’s pretty rough. :/ I hope they’re not too hard on you.
@ningyou cutting is the way i deal with things too…
XD me and my loved one are so hopeless…both of us cut (i forced him to stop upon my “request” *coughdemandcough*) and we’re both suicidal…and we’ll both follow each other to the grave…
and yea…my parents aren’t rough on me, just…they don’t seem to care and that feeling of being loathed by my parents makes me feel like their being more hard on me…
@ ningyou i HATE making robots. i hate doing things i’m forced to do (like homework and blah…)
i am really happy tho cuz any day now mom will b getting me meds 2 help w/ my stomach issue (looooooooooooooots of pain everyday often so bad i can’t even move and can only cry for hours…) which turns out the med is antidepressant so i don’t have 2 tell my idiot doctor about being depressed (i loathe all doctors except my loved one atm… yes he’s learning to be a doctor, cute right? X3)
257 comments
): nikki… i don’t know what else to do except… *hug* ): i can only half understand your pain… how can i help you?
and no i will NOT kill you and i will b furious at anyone that says they will or offers you ideas.
I don’t know!she’s on this site.she’s vnot suicidle.this is my venting place.for vonce!I feel vlike vripping. My eyes out!
Nikki i don’t really know you bit I will be sad if you die. You need someone close by that cares. And who’s the person u know that made an account?
My friend alyssa.I love her.but this is my veting. Place I don’t want one good thing taken from meDX
Oh well that answers that…
Please kill me *tears*
Maybe she doesn’t know your account name
I told her:/
Maybe make a new account that she doesn’t know of?
You can change your screen name i think.
TRUE:/ but she deleted hers.finally!its okay.but still…kill me!
Why did she suddenly make one, then delete it?
Not sure why she made one.and I made her delete it.
Strange…
Yea:/
No one will kill me then?
:3 we love u 2 much 2 kill you <3
Assisted suicide is illegal so no, also i love you too much to do so. Besides if you do you will never find out why she randomly joins a suicide site.
I’m loved for once? But why?
Because you are freaking awesome person that has so much on her to do list.
😀 cuz ur awesome nikki, you really are amazing ^^
Wish I saw it.but thanks<:)
Crying sucks.I do that every night now.
Hey smiling on the outside…can you drive?
D: aww *wipes away your tears* ):>
Sorry i’m 15, can’t drive, plus my mom doesn’t trust me with a car after my time in a golf cart (not a disaster but nearly crashed).
I wish someone would:'(
Ugg.we need a driver maeliin and smiling:/
Wait are you coming smilin on the outside??
Sorry forgot the ‘g’
not sure spring and summer will be busy. Also i have no idea how i could explain it to my parents so it will be tricky
i can’t go this summer… next summer i’ll b driving tho and i would b able 2 go…
No explaining.sneak out.do you live clos to MD?
Okay….we wil figure it out
I ment close
live in PA
That’s not to far.maeliin can pick. Me up next summer ans drive ti get you and we need one more person:/
Sorry maeliin.I plan ahead:;
What are you all planning? If you don’t mind me asking.
@ningyou we are trying to plan a road trip. we think it might be fun. to have us all meet up and just travel around.
No everyone.just like four or five of us.so far its me and maeliin and I think angel ash.we ned a guy or two:/
*not
we should wait until smiling on the outside can come
btw if we have 2 wait on the road trip i’m still going 2 try to organise the ice skating if i can. it’d b fun
:/ awsome.my plan is blown.
Road trips are always fun. Hard to plan though. xD
Yea.I know where I wana go!
Maeliin…I don’t want to wait.id like to.bu I bcant take this much longer…I can wait till next summer.after….I think ill be done
If you guys want to go without me that’s fine i could always come later. Probably won’t be able to come for 3-4 years so ya…
Iwill be dead then..
ya nikki if you want you and maeliin can go w/o me, have some fun, hopefully i can come later.
If we are alive.I don’t want to leave you behind:/ but I can’t stay much longer either:/
It’ll be fine, i’d probably ruin it anyways, besides i could always come to the next roadtrip you plan.
You won’t ruin it.why can’t we just pickyou up next summer?
Well i’m not sure still for next summer. Probably not as i can never lie to my parents to save my life (or dream of sneaking out i no its sad :(). Lets wait until then, that way i will definately be sure.
Okay
I’m going to cry myself to sleep again….my butchy ugly ass self that is
I ment bitchy
oh gosh I’m sorry nikki, I bet you aren’t ugly…butchy or bitchy either.
I feel really bad, i’m really sorry nikki, and you are better than you think. So far i have never seen a ***** that has a low opinion of his/herself and there are a lot of bitches in my school.
I am.why are you sorry
Don’t be sorry.I cry every night.I get juged.I bet you judge me tok smiling on the outside
Yeah, people say I’m sorry to be nice, I guess, but it really helps I think… I mean I feel good when someone tells me they are sorry even if they have nothing to be sorry for, if that makes any sense.
You’re not a ***** in the least bit. You’re such a sweet person and I’m sure you’re not ugly either.
I don’t like people being sorry.being sorry doenst help with somethings.but thank you anyway.goodnight
I meant sorry for making you wait 3 years for a roadtrip. Also i don’t judge people. Judging people before actually meeting them can cause you to have ideas that are not true, then try to base a conversation on it, and prevent the person from having a true conversation with them.
I am ugly ningyou.I’m the ugliest girl in the world
true, being sorry doesn’t help,and I’m sorry for that too.
Yea….well everyone on here.I’m I bisexual.so suck it!
Wish I could do that for real
I highly doubt that Nikki. You’re probably a very beautiful person who has yet to see their true beauty.
Lol its okayy
If iwas beautiful I wouldn’t be called ugly my whole life.
I’m sure you’re not ugly, even though i have never seen you. I’m not judging, i’m deducing 🙂
You seem funny nikki, a good sense of humor so that makes you unugly. My opinion anyway.
Maybe they’re just trying to make themselves feel better. Remember hollywood beautiful people are the ones that usually (but not always) get pregnant before marrige
I guess……but umm….anyone who doesn’t accept e being bi on here can suck my. Invisable dick:)
Haha that’s so true!
Hollywood people are actually pretty ugly, when you give them a second look. Makeup and camera angles and youch ups make them beautiful and still they aren’t!
Don’t listen to them, they’re wrong about you being ugly. Like Smiling said, they were probably just trying to feel better about themselves.
nikki straight or gay or both you are still a beautiful lady, because you are funny. 🙂
They are.id love to be anyone but me
True. Lol nice nikki 🙂
Probably.and I dunno….I’m ugly
also you are smart because i can’t figure out how to post so fast!
smart=unugly
Nice? What’d I do? I’m slow sorry
Ya i notice i seem to delay a lot when i post comments.
Haha okay I dunno okay lol I guess
of course I am drunk, that could cause a delay in my posts 🙂
Huh? Smiling…I’m conused: /
Also you found this site which means you know how to use google, which a lot of people don’t know how to use (Amish people mostly).
I’ll watch for a minute
I want smerinof ice! Its so yummy
Hey i’m sober (never drank, i’m 15!) and i notice a delay in my post.
What’s smerinof ice?
Haha true true.
Watch what
maybe i am better off…no I had 3 glasses on wine and 3 baileys, one of which was free
Alcohol.yummy alcohol:) ivenever been drunck.but id like to be.
smernoff? I think it is vodka
Your buzzed maybe
it wasn’t my idea to be drunk, but that is no excuse…not sorry though till tomorrow morning
yeah buzzed, that’s a better description
and yes it was yummy
Alcohol does sound nice right about now. But my mom would kill me if I touched that stuff again. >.<
Something i would probably say when i’m older 🙂
There’s another kind too.not vodka.I fel dumb.I’ve never kissedAnyone either: /
well try red wine, at least it is healthy for you they say
oh I didn’t kiss anyone till I was in college, 19 I think, no joke
Try some kalua and milk smiling.its yummyyyyy
white russian?
I’ve never kissed anyone either
My health teacher always said i glass of red wine a week was healthy, i glass a day wasn’t
No red wine for me.
I’m not a alchoholic btw I just like some things.
And I do wana wait that long:/
oh I drink 2 glasses a day, and I am still alive so far
Don’t rush your first kiss, there’s no shame in not having kissed anyone. (:
Have you noticed any memory loss or cravings for alchohol?
I can picutre you smiling….your cute.well what I picture you looking like lol.I bet your cute anyway:)
I’m not an alcoholic either, just tonight I had that extra glass for free…Luciano is good to me
I know.but…I want it over with.
who me nikki? yuck I am ugly. yeah too much drinking makes me forget stuff, like where my credit card is
I sleepy now night night
thanks nikki, never thought anyone would ever be caught dead calling me cute 🙂
>:D i finsihed the hat! (random) i’ve nvr kissed any1 either nor to i plan to.
however my 1st kiss was stolen by the kid i was babysitting a year ago…
Noooo smiling on the outside I picture cute
oh you meant smiling? oh well 🙂
well I last kissed someone a year ago, if that matters
Trust me, rushing into it will ruin it. It’s better to wait.
My first kiss was disgusting. XD
Night Nikki. (:
Awwwww maeliin!!!! We could get ours both over with:)
And why no smiling.
YAY! You now have a hat, lucky!!!
Ya i guess it doesn’t really matter if anyone has ever kissed or not (i feel silly as i’m typing this)
:3 i bet ur all cute! (i look at who a person is not the shell their in sooo)
you all BEAUTIFUL in my eyes ^^
Now I wana stay….ugg….can’t make up my mind lol
X3 it’s a mini top hat. black with a pink ribbon and a pink rose all hand sewn and gawd i will never touch a sewing needle again
noooooooo you are lol….
XD smiling i gotta agree w/ u, i feel silly typing about kisses and blah too lol
Maeliin?????good plan bad plan???
It sounds awesome
the hat i mean
You know…me to but I brought it up so it okay:)
Your hat sounds so cute Maeliin.
It does lol
yes the hat sounds cute, upload a photo
Ill take that as bad plan maeliin…..sorry….dumb sugestion
how do i upload a picture of it?
Yes! PErfect idea!
darned if I know!
I barely know how to post
copy and paste it?
I guess you could not answer my question maeliin.gosh!kidding lol
i think you can in a post
worth a try
You could try uploading it to Photobucket and post the link. I’m not sure if you upload directly to this site.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Cup cakes!!!!
BLUE BERRIES!
I love blue berries, and cup cakes
STAR FRUIT. XD
Cupcakes sound good. Too bad most things are closed this time of night or I’d go get some. >.<
So do i 🙂
7-11 open 24 hours and they have cupcakes, i dunno about blueberries
I don’t lol
Hey maeliin….answer…..quistion…you not did
Heehee no clue why I did that
Hey!guess what I’m thinking!
jewel is open but it’s too far, and I am too tired
cup cakes!
There’s no 24hr stores within walking distance for me and I can’t legally drive. xD
GUESS SOMONE
XD
I shouldn’t drive now either, probably over the limit
CUPCAKES!
Heehee…
And I dunno……no lol.
ningyou…guess what I’m thinking
darn
Well i should go to bed night all
@Nikki
Does it deal with food?
@dunno
Yeah, probably better not to drive if you’re drinking.
gnight smiling, I will go shortly too
🙁 nighty night smiling!
sorry i didn’t reply nikki i fell asleep at my laptop…x.x nya… (nya = meow in japanese. also 1 ofmy favorite words. baka is another of my favorite words. in japanese it means idiot :3)
umm…what was your question nikki?
yeah I might spilll it LOL
Lol nope
Goodnight Smiling.
g’night smiling, please sleep well
thanks guys you too 🙂
We could get our first over and done with.you said your not far away.
Guess ningyou
@Maeliin
That’s seriously what Nya means? I was looking for months and couldn’t figure that out. xD
first cupcake?
Your welcome smiling!!!!!!
that actually is a great idea. however…i’m not sure if my loved one would appriciate me doing that… he wouldn’t know, but eventually i would be self-guilted into telling him…
No.its not food
@Nikki
Imma guess kitty! :3
oh yeah
@ningyou lol X3 glad to have helped
🙂 i feel happy after talking to you guys, i think it was a good thing we all joined this site ^^
So?its not cheating unless you like are dating me.if uts on kiss he would understand.
great maeliin me too…speak japanese next time, that will be fun
@ningyou
No lol
@maeliin
same!!!!!
._. but…i don’t actually KNOW that he would understand that…
>,…,> (angry vampire-ish face) his 1st kiss was stolen by a young librarian. baaaaaad librarian…
@Nikki
I give up. ;_; What are you thinking of? >.<
@i dunno.. i only look up/know certain words/phrases o.o i could attempt to speak in spanish but i don’t know enough of that either…
is OK, nice to hear you in any language
He would.if we like made out or slept together he would flip.but one small kiss….he’d undertand.
You could ask first or just say I kissed you and pushed me off I guess
IMTHINKING OF
SUICIDE
XD
Japanese is a hard language to learn. I’ve been attempting for three months and barely know Romaji. I cringe at the thought of learning Hiragana and Kanji.
well, good night youngsters I’m off to bed. 🙂 thanks for the conversation
@nikki…i ‘ll ask first. if he says no then i can’t tho, his word is law, at least to me..^^ i will do anything he asks of me when he asks, i am his loyal servant <3
Night I dunno
probably tough to write it too 🙂
g’night i dunno, sweet dreams (the have a spam block here?)
@ningyou o.o oh wow you’re doing great then! XD
@dunno
Goodnight.
@Nikki
That’s a nice thing to think of. XD
Id just love to have a guy or girl to Be mine.but willnever happen.I know no bis or lesbians at school who aren’t taken:/
Ningyou….sarcasim?
😀 ppl in my school loathe me and i’m not too fond of them, so i will never be loyal to any of them…
my so called friend nearly broke my arm HELPING the people who were beating me up.
@Maeliin
Aw, thanks. (:
Although I’m learning from a book and have the attention span of a rat so I’m only halfway through one book. >.<
XD attention span of a rat…better than a goldfish right?
@Nikki
You could always find an Internet dating site.
I feel you though, I’d love to have a girl be mine too.
That’s why I’m scared to come out…..id rather be with agirl who’s close to me so it looks lik we are just friends.but that will never happen…
Your straight?
@Maeliin
You make a good point, guess it is better than a fish. XD
oh yea nikki…i looked more closely at the map of our state and saw that we are only ONE city away from each other!not a 10 minute drive, but not an hour :3 we should try to meet up at some point
@Nikki
Was that directed at me?
@ningyou o.o i’m very sorry but i have not a clue if ur a girl or guy… XD so er…yea, could u remind me? >_<
Id love to!did you email me vwhere you are?I never go it:/
Yes you ningyou lol
@Maeliin
I’m a girl.
x.x TAHT’S what i forgot to do…curse my attention span..
@Nikki
Nope, I’m a lesbian.
Oh yaaaaaaa I forgot!your ummmm…lesbian.right?
sorrysorrysorry!
nikki remind me 2morrow 2 give myself 10 or so lovelynew cuts….
MY MATH TEACHER IS AN IDIOT. i just got back after 4 DAYS of being out and he gave me a test on the new unit with NO MAKE UP TEST ALLOWED.
i FAILED.
You said your twenty right ningyou?
How old are you maeliin?
No maeliin>:'( I wont
x.x why not?
No maeliin!no!
oh, i’m 16. hating every second of it….
por que! (why in spanish) x.x i like to cut… i just don’t have anything sharp …SIZZORS!
I don’t vwant you hurt!it will be my fault!another thing acaued.another person I hurt.I love everyone I’ve talked to on here!any of you get hurt on my watch its my fault.I love you . Maeliin.you commented on my first post.the first posg I made.you made me happy.I can’t have you hurt.
@Nikki
I’m 17.
@Maeliin
Don’t feel bad, math is a hard subject overall.
._. but..i enjoy it…whatever… because you don’t want me to FOR NOW i won’t…
Sizzors suck.and don’t rely on cutting.my friend does.christal.she’s the girl I love.the one dating the guy.she was in the hospital more timesthen I can count this school vyear.
@ningyou.. i’ve never failed anything. ever. my parents are going to kill me when they see my grade tomorrow
No don’t be mad!I don’t want you suverly hurt!please maeliin!
Tomorrows Saturday..
i’m not mad. 🙂
x.x shoot…i won’t b on till late 2morrow if it’s saturday…
my parents signed me up for robotics club which meets wednesdays and saturdays and any free day we have…gawd i hate it…i used to love it but now…no… anyways it lasts like all day…
Maeliin!please!I’m sorry.I want to save someone.someone I care about!
@Nikki
As long as you don’t go too deep, cutting is a good coping method. Least to me at least. I’ve done it for three years and not once have I gone to the hospital.
@Maeliin
That’s pretty rough. :/ I hope they’re not too hard on you.
^^ nikki i’m not mad, and i’ve said i won’t cut for now, please don’t worry 🙂
That’s fun.I will have no one I know to talk to tomorrow:/
@ningyou cutting is the way i deal with things too…
XD me and my loved one are so hopeless…both of us cut (i forced him to stop upon my “request” *coughdemandcough*) and we’re both suicidal…and we’ll both follow each other to the grave…
and yea…my parents aren’t rough on me, just…they don’t seem to care and that feeling of being loathed by my parents makes me feel like their being more hard on me…
@Maeliin
So you make robots? That’s so cool.
@Nikki
I’ll be on all day tomorrow. All my stuff is still being moved so all I’ve got to do is sit in my room on my phone all day. XD
I know ningyou.but…icare about you and maeliin.and others on here.I may not save me.but I want to save someone on vhere. 🙁
Okay ningyou.and cutting helps me too.but….I can’t have either of you really hurt!
@Nikki
I can understand. Just like we want to help save you. (:
sorry nikki..
@ ningyou i HATE making robots. i hate doing things i’m forced to do (like homework and blah…)
i am really happy tho cuz any day now mom will b getting me meds 2 help w/ my stomach issue (looooooooooooooots of pain everyday often so bad i can’t even move and can only cry for hours…) which turns out the med is antidepressant so i don’t have 2 tell my idiot doctor about being depressed (i loathe all doctors except my loved one atm… yes he’s learning to be a doctor, cute right? X3)
But if I can’t save you why try to save me? I need yo save yo.one or both of you
Your not sorry. 🙁 you don’t care.no one does!
ok i rly gotta go, 2 tired 2 stay up…
love u guys (yea i rly do love u, u feel like the family i always wanted. one that cares.)
so sweet dreams and all, cya 2morrow
@Nikki
Because like you care for us, we care for you.
nikki i do care… i was saying sorry for not being able 2 b here most of tomorrow…that’s not my choise tho..
good night guys…
@Maeliin
Goodnight. (:
I thought you were saying sorry for cutting or something…
if I can’t save either of you why care.
Goodnigt maeliin.luvyou
Goidnight ningyou.see you tomorrow. <3
@Nikki
Who knows, maybe you are making a difference for us and helping us feel better.
@Nikki
You’re leaving too? Well goodnight then, see you tomorrow. (:
I’m sorry I left.and I hope I am.I don’t want anyone to die.knowing I could vhave saved them.like angel ash. :/
I WISH TO DIE AS WELL… WE HAVE OUR WANTS, SOME OF US JUST CHOOSE TO ACT ON THEM. I HATE THIS GOD FORSAKEN LIFE!!!!!!!