Every Day I’m hoping to die!

Everyday I hope to die.  I’ve worked very hard to make a good life for myself.  After using drugs since I was a child (18 years) and going to jail for a few years, I found recovery.  I went to an outpatient drug rehab and to 12 Step meetings.  They really did help me put my life back on track.  I learned that I always felt depressed and used drugs because of where my life was at.  Fortunately, by learning from others who have recovered from similar situations, I recovered too.  I went to two colleges and earned a degree in Business Administration, and a Bachelor’s degree in accounting. I was planning on becoming a C.P.A., and was advised by the C.P.A. Board, that I am eligible to do this even with my past history.  Unfortunately, during my last year in college, I went out one evening to help a neighbor in distress.  After a disabled man working at a Seven Eleven store made a false report to the police, I was falsely arrested.  The police made up two false charges against me.  Three months later they made a third false charge.  It took 71 court appearances, six and a half years, and about $81, 000 in legal fees to be found NOT GUILTY of all three charges.  During these court proceedings,I was threatened that I would be put in jail again for at least a year.  The police officers perjured themselves (I have documentary evidence to prove this).  Some of the eight lawyers that I hired through these proceedings committed legal malpractice.  Several judges did wrongful actions against me, including incorrectly charging a jury.  I had two trials, and an appeal over a period of six and a half years.  I was found NOT GUILTY of all three charges.  I hired an attorney to sue the police and the County.  The lawyer filed the wrong charges in Federal Court, and the case was dismissed.  Then he filed the correct charge in the state court, but it was past the statute of limitations, and again dismissed.  I paid another attorney another $25,000 to sue for legal malpractice.  The malpractice defense attorneys got my case wrongfully thrown out of the Supreme court, even after admitting the legal malpractice that was done to me.  At this stage of events, my lawyer is appealing the wrongful decision by the Supreme court judge for throwing out my malpractice suit.  I have spent over $100,000 in legal fees.  This has taken up over a quarter of my life (almost 13 years).  My opportunities to think and work as an accountant have stripped from me.  I graduated from college in 1999.  I have been severely depressed and haven’t been able to do much work.  I talk about my situation everyday to someone or a group of people.  People are afraid that I might explode soon and do something terrible.  I feel the same way.  I have lost a temporary job as a result of this recently that only paid me $7.50 per hour .  I can’t support my self.  I have been denied aide from Social Security and the State.  Every day I’m ready to die.  If the law suit is resolved, I have a chance to have a life again, otherwise I’m sure to find myself getting close to the obituaries.