I was sexually abused at a young age for a period of time. I’m now 18 years old and through out my childhood/teenage years I found it hard to trust people, I am also depressed for as long as I can remember. I met my boyfriend at the age of about 12 and after 3 years I trusted him enough to start a relationship. This relationship last 2 years, I was in some parts of my life content because of my relationship. In August 2009 I found out my boyfriend hadÂ been sleepingÂ Â with another girlÂ for 2-3 months starting in April. I was devasted. I forgave him. Stupid as it was and gave him another chance to find out he had started cheating on me in November again with a different girl. I found out through facebook. Whatever bit of happiness I had myself and whatever bit of trust I had in anyone is now completely gone. My Ex was my best friend as well as my boyfriend and knew about my problems. He was the only person I could talk to. I don’t even have that much anymore. I sunk into a dark depression and began cutting again. As far I as I was concerned I had no hope. I attempted sucide and failed. I planned to try again.
In Janurary 2010 my friends father killed himself. His 16 year old son found him hanging in his garage. 2 weeks later a boy I grew up with all my life also comitted sucide. I have been here to witness the devastation left behind. I have seen the familys of these men struggle to cope day after day.
Although I am in agony, mentally I do believe there is hope because I have to believe. I could not leave my family in the state I have seen these other familys. I think everyone on this site needs to believe a liitle bit and maybe consider the people they will be leaving behind. I have been through a lot from a young age and I hope things will get better.