Have nothing left…

I’m almost 30 and living with my parents because I’m on disability
and don’t have the money to live on my own. I always wanted thought I’d be married with children and at least mildly successful.
Instead, I’m on a million different rotating medications to deal with
my post thyroidectomy complications, the side effects of the complications, the side effects of the side effects….I love my boyfriend, but I know he will never want the things in life I do..and I
can’t bring myself to tell him I had a chemical pregnancy after a birth control mishap when I had ovarian surgery.
I’m always sick with something, whether it’s a cold, a migraine,
a side effect. I’ve been really trying to think of reasons to live…
I know I have a family who love me, but I am nothing but a continual burden on them. I see nothing ahead but a life of struggle
for me, why bring them along?
If there were a possiblity of life changing, I might want
to live. But there isn’t.