10 days.

  September 7th, 2011 by ac400

Hey,

Iv been reading this post for quite some while now. I dont want to bore anyone with my pathetic story, as I am only to blame, maybe in the coming days I might. But I have learnt that life is so cold, I have lost everything. My dreams, the person I loved. I tried to stay strong but I cant, the depression kicks in. I had everything and now I have nothing. Maybe someone can relate to this, maybe you cant. I know Im going to cause pain to people who have met or cared for me. The worst thing is, that I cannot live a life that is a lie, where I am not happy, I play a game of pretend. I dont want to disappoint anyone anymore, as I cannot be the person I was going to be. I wish I could just get back everything in life but as life has taught me, things dont go your way, no matter how you feel or who you are. I have tried my best. I want to spend the last few days, acting happy, making someone smile. As I am scared of burning in hell but Im even more scared to be alive. The pain is too much.

I genuinely think these are my last ten days. I never wanted to die but I cant live a life of torment and pain.

Im going to miss everything. Im going to miss everyone so much, but its life I guess.

I cant blame anyone but myself anymore. 🙂

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