what do you do when your step-dad or whatever takes you out one day to go shopping and he let’s you have a few drinks. then he starts to feel you up and you don’t know what to do. and your mother asks if you slept with him like it was all your fault. then probably months later he comes out of the closet to you saying he cross dresses and all this shit. and tells me stories. and uses that as an excuse as to why he was feeling you up. and then he sits around and tries to play daddy. like, he has any say in my life or what i do. when he’s sitting there and all i can think of is him being gay. and he married my mother. and finally she is happy. and she doesn’t know.
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“What do you do?”
You dwell on it. If you’re going to dwell, make sure that when you come to a conclusion, it’s that everything going on in your life is not a reflection of you. Your step fathers homosexuality and friendly uncle tendencies are his issues and it’s effed up that he exposed you to them, but they aren’t your problems. Your mothers attitude is an issue that probably took root long before you were born. Her need to have a man or be supported; she’s probably been tossed away/abandoned more times than she can count.
It’s your parents that are messed up, not you. True, a very large part of what makes you you is your experiences and the people you spend the most time with. To an extent we are products of our environment, but you still have a choice. At the end of the day, you are your own person with your own dreams and aspirations.
Dwell on the issues, reflect on them, confront them; you’ll soon see that a lot of your problems aren’t your own. Realize that others are projecting their own faults onto you and keep from adopting them as your own. Your mom is happily married to a gay man that abused you. Where do you go from here?
How do you mean that though? How everything going on in my life is not a reflection of me?
They are his issues and i feel like the only reason he even told me was because he fucked up and did something he shouldn’t have done. at all. and especially in the position he’s in.
My mother, needed to be suppported 24/7 because she was raising 2 daughters all on her own. And i understand that. And i accept that. And i totally agree and understand what you’re saying about that.
I only wish i could find somewhere to start to figure out where i go from here. I thank you. You helped me to see it in a different light
I mean that any baby born into a situation like yours, raised by the type of people you’re being raised by, would receive the same treatment that you’re getting, more or less. You’re brought down to their level simply because you’re there, not because there’s anything wrong with you.
I’m glad I was able to shed some light. Think about what you want for yourself, short term and long term. Focus on building yourself back up; treat yourself, don’t wait for others to. I don’t believe any one of us is special but we can do special things. It’s your life to do with what you will.
Find a daily purpose. Wake up every morning, have some OJ and the day will unfold. Take 10 mins for yourself and then spend the rest of the day filling the needs that come your way. Yeah, life is shit, especially when you’re still under the thumb of your parents. But it’s not forever, things change. Keep posting on this, vent those toxic feelings as often as possible. Survive long enough to reach adulthood and THEN see how you feel about things.
If anything, from the help of you, a complete stranger.. i will keep trying, a while longer. Thanks.
Your step dad’s a freak.
yeah. and it’s really a fucked up situation for me. HA.
i’ve been through worse.
Dont off your self
there’s just so much more to it. and i’ve told someone who i thought could help me. but, all that created was more problems. i’m done telling people.
I wish I could help you. We all have different problems… Some like to say “Man I have it so much worse than this person blah blah blah” but the way I see it is depression, grief, saddness, ect is all the same for everyone. You losing a cousin might hurt you as much as my girlfriend dumping me. We can’t help how hard things hurt us.
I will be there for you to talk to. Email or text, either way.
we do all have different problems and i agree with what you said. also, it kinda sucks because nobody realizes that some people have it so much worse than them. and i do. which is weird because i still choose to be selfish.
thanks. that means alot actually.
More problems? Usually means you told the wrong person… But it is up to you. If you ever change your mind just let me know
(I am not on here often so… try to change your mind sooner than later :P)
ohmygod. sad and true.
😛
Your step dad makes me laugh. no offense
HA. i’m glad you can laugh at that. (not being rude, seriously.)