I tried again tonight, but I couldn’t make myself do it. I was just laying there beside the train tracks, having a panic attack. My boyfriend kept calling over and over but I didn’t want to hear his voice. I ran away from my house, so my grandma called him thinking I was with him. He wouldn’t stop calling and was scared, and driving around looking for me. And I knew he’d come by the train tracks, and I had 10 more minutes til the next train. I eventually just started walking home cause I knew I couldn’t do it. I’m too big of a *****. He found me walking home though, and is scared to death I’ll do something. I know he deserves better than me though.
The only thing stopping me from suicide is, I don’t know where I’ll go. I don’t really believe in God. I don’t know what I believe in but I really don’t think it’s heaven or hell or Jesus or anything. I’m so obsessed with finding out what happends after people die, but I just can’t figure it out. Does anyone have any theories of afterlife that they believe will happen? If I get a better idea of what will happen, I can go through with it.
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After you die you will reincarnate as a tree (if you commit suicide). Birds will make nests in your branches. You’ll stand there, through winter and summer. No one will talk to you, you’ll have no companionship. You’ll watch soundlessly as bears and deer take a dump near you. Every once in a great while hippies will drop acid in your presence. They will be the only people that will hear you as you wail in pain.
I hope that helped.
Asking what will happen when you die is an impossible question. I believe in no religion, god, heaven or hell. I believe when your dead you enter a dreamless sleep. However there are so may other belief systems out there. I can’t tell you what to believe about death. That’s a conclusion you must come to yourself. Also not to intrude but where are you from?
i’m from north carolina.
Aparantly there is a machine that can see energy in your body and if you die in front of it who even is looking actually sees your energy/ Aura http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyf9fpPeEr0&feature=related.
someone told me that when people die infront of this machine you can actually see a torso of energy leave the body and float away.
I believe that when people die there energy roams the cosmos forever. if they die with good energy then thats what floats around (good eergy). if they are evil and die with bad energy they are stuck with that for eternity and this becomes there hell.
this might sound far fetched to some people but its what i think.
Then sometimes i believe in heaven and hell and i often try to send myself to hell i guess it depends on the person LOL
don’t give up on life…give it a second try… I believe in god and that there is a creator…where else would we have come from?…does god exist doesn’t matter… it matters when you believe he does…I do because when i remember all the unbelievably bad things that happened 2 me…I remember god’s words and they somehow bring healing…in the absence of my sister and parents….I feel the healing this belief has brought me..If u want to talk could u email me on johhnyboysmif@hotmail.com at least consider making 1 friend b4 u take this step…the sun follows
True happiness if found through Jesus…
Don’t ask me if I truly believe that but it can’t hurt, not like anyone else is really happy. I go to church every Sunday and everybody’s mad happy. It’s just a real optimistic place.
I think you need to think of your boyfriend. If your gone, what have you left for him? Shit, I think your mad lucky to have someone like him who’s willing to accept your love. And you seem like someone who has alot of love to give.
@dareme313 I only asked because 313 is Detroit’s area code and that is my home town.
u will only know when its you time
Ask Jesus into your life. Once he is with you, you KNOW. You know your safe now, and safe if you die. (and you won’t want to committ suicide once you know him) He has made us good with god through HIS actions on earth.. dying on the cross voluntarily, so that if we come to him in this lifetime we have a free pass to heaven so to speak. Its good news (the best I had ever had). Matthew in the bible is a good place to start, if you want to find out more 🙂 The imperfection down here is on a massive scale. We hurt people, and they hurt us. But if you go to him and ask him to do this journey with you (as no-one can do it alone and remain sane) he will work this out for you.
Sorry-not feeling the Jesus thing, I try but its dead air..no response, anyone who says they get a response is lying to themselves. That I’ll never do.