my life

  October 6th, 2011 by peggie

my 2 oldest kids now in there late 20s are not my husbands i have never kept that a secret the only thing i knowingly did wrong was tell them both they were frm same man until a couple of years ago all came out in a family argument,a year ago i had to give up work as i could nolonger cope with it as i have collapsed vertabrae and fatigue the pain can be unbearable at times then i told my 2 oldest i couldnt look after their kids as i was to ill they havent spoke to me since they say im a embarresment to them and pathetic in the past 2 wks ive recieved 2 letters frm them saying they hate me for the lies and for all the crap in there lives one of them is getting married next year my brother and my son is going but not me or my hubby are aloud ,the thing is ever since this all started my husband wont come near me ive lost the bulk of my family and i live in a small village and alot of the people are going to the wedding and slagging me everytime i go out the door i cant cope with this all i feel right now is it would be the best thing for me to do is kill myself no one needs or wants me i cant carry on with no family its really dire im always thinking of death one less headache for hubby in order for my family to be free of me i must die i wish i knew of a pain free way to go

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