My Story

  October 18th, 2011 by drumhead138

ok, I’m 39. I met this girl 12 years ago. I fell in love with her from the SECOND we met. She became my everything. We dated, and married. I love her completely. But, she was mean! Always so very mean to me. I never measured up…Her name is Kathy…

 

So, I moved from Colorado to Ohio to be with her…We married and lived in Ohio for 5 years. Then we had our first child. I love that child Sophia.  Kathy was always so mean to me though. But I’m telling you I loved her! Well anyway, we had our second child 3 years later…this would be 7 years into our marriage..I was mean back. I will not lie. After being treated like crap, you tend to fight back. Anyway…Now it’s the 11th year and she’s cheating on me…OMG, she probably cheated on me SEVERAL times, but I did not know it…

 

Anyway, it’s the President of the hospital she works for. He makes ALOT of money…And was having sex with him for several months. HE wanted sex. SHE wanted a relationship. She destroyed our family to be with him…only he didn’t want her.. So, My love gone. My life gone…It;s been 1 1/2 years and I can’t stop thinking about her…

 

I was planning to kill myself tonight…Gun to throat…40 cal. and it’s hard, I’m not going to lie. It’s soo hard. I’ve been practising for MONTHS but it never seems to happen… She–She doesn’t give a shit…I hoped and waited all night for her to call me…for her to show me ANYTHING… It’s a long story and I’ve left out soo much. But suffice it to say, She and everyone around me know how serious I am. And she didn’t call. Part of me does not want to die alone. Part of me wants her to be here when it happens..

 

See, I have the transcript of her and this guy…It’s long. and she’s crying to a friend about how much she loved him. about the sex and him talking dirty to her… and I’m left holding the bag. I weight lift and am actually in really good physical condition. But this NEW guy she’s dating is ever stronger and BIGGER than me. and he makes more money too…

 

I’ve dated lots of girls but none measure up to Kathy… well one did, but she rejected me too..I don’t blame her though. Teresa, is a good girl. She’s just messed up too. I came on too hard and too fast with her…But Honestly, I just want Kathy. and, she doesn’t give a FUCK about me…it kills me…

 

so, why can I NOT pull the trigger? I want to so badly…I cannot tell you how many nights I fall asleep and dream about me and her being back together…only to wake up and realize that it’s never going to happen…

Give me the strength to pull the trigger…

 

I should mention that A) I have zero friends. B) I’m home every night, no one calls me. C) I’m outta money. D) I drink alot…anymore.Which I NEVER did in the marriage..

 

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