I have wanted to end my life for the past two years and the scariest part about it is I know i could very easily walk into my bathroom grab some pills or a razor and kill myself, I think that is the worst part. I have no one to stay behind for, I keep thinking oh well one day i will wake up and be happy. Its been awhile since i cried my self to sleep every night, eventually the crying subsided, i didnt need to cut myself anymore i did not care if i felt alive i didnt want to give myself piercings to feel pain. I am still here because i know even though i am 18 i wont make it out of my 20s I dont want to i cant see myself finnishing college or getting married to a man or a woman i have never really felt love i have always wanted to i have friends who say they are depressed its bull shit know one knows what i feel i sometimes want to kill them for complaining about how hard their lives are but i dont i care so much about other people and not wanting them to feel like i do i know im a lost cause but i dont want this to happen to another person hurt by our society……….