Since i am no longer consulting in suicide(well, i try to quit every week or so but always fall)i decidet to write a little story on how i became the suicide consult.
My mother was raped in Ethiopia in 1981 She was not offered abortion as an alternative and was forced to abandone me in the Black Lion hospital in the capital Addis Ababa.
In Ethiopia black children were traciked to white families ever since the 1960’s under the disguise of “international adoption” It was a very “hys hys” activity. Not many people knew about it at all, and it was not reported in the local or European media. These international adoption programs were mainly run by christian missionaries who worked for interpedia or “save the children” foundation.
Most of these children were born as a result of rape. Abortions for raped teenage mothers did not beocome legal in Ethiopia untill 2006 65-years after indepence and 15-years after the end of the civil war
Ofcourse one must understand that pretty much all African countries from Nigeria to Ethiopia had since the 1960’s and still do a thriving domestic baby trafficking industry. In Africa across the continent children are often sold as domestic house servents, or worse. Because of this Africans do not really consider international adoption to be immoral, as it is a way for African children to “get a change” in a white country.
Today most international adoption programs have been shut down do to all shorts of scancals often assosiated with them. Human traffiking as a result in both Asia and Africa has moved underground, where it is not regulated in any way. The problem really is raped teenage girls forced to give there children up into hospitals, wich then hand them over to adoption. In all honestly abolishing international adoption wont really make the problem go away. Abortion and sterilisation programs are the only real way to confron the problem, including the huge and out of controll population boom in thir world countries. Here is a traditional wedding of a 10-year old Ethiopian girl.
My mother was raped in 1981 Ethiopia had fallen into communist Marxist tyranny in 1977, wish resulted in the era known as the great purges.
http://www.ethiopiantreasures.co.uk/pages/derg.htm
Back then the purges were used as an exuse not to allow abortions for raped teenage mothers, but the problems go a lot deeper then just that. Abortion programs of any kind were entirely banned from the country in the 1960’s as well, during a time of relative peace and econimic prosperity. Ethiopia is the most undeveloped country in all of Africa as it was only colonized by the Italians for 5-years after they were driven away by the British mercinary gideon force, wich imposed on the Ethiopian people the last unelected African feudal dictator, Haile Selassie. Haile Selassie did not to adress the rape of Ethiopian girls under “traditional marridge” wich resulted in a populationEXPLOSION Today the American backed CIA government of Meles Zenavi has passed lome laws against child marridge wich however are not being enforced.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-13681053
International adoption in Ethiopia during the 1980’s was losely justified under the civil war era and the great purges with began in 1977 and endet in the fall of the communist giovernbment in 1991 Ironicly the baby trafficking out of Ethiopia ESCALATED after 1991 10-years later by 2001 it was already become a multi million dollar a year industry!
http://bornblackmag.com/ethiopia-adoption.html
Today in some countries like Nigeria where international adoptions are not allowed children are still tracffiked as domestic houte pets or used in dark satanistic woodoo rituals. There parents are usually raped teennage mothers. The problem is very similar in South-Africa as well. Police are “unable” to do anything about it. Today a lot of children are also kidnapped from there parents in cold blood. The origins of the problem are in the fact that African culture is very family orientated. Anyone for one reason or another born outisde the faimily has no real value. He or she is considered SCUM and free hands for child traffikers. The problem is, many of these child traffikers today are going after babies born into real African families! Africans have for generations tolerated child traffking for a number of reasons. Children have even been sent from African families to hundreds of miles away(mostly to the capital)or overseas in hopes one day returning to suppor the family. Such naive attitudes towards human traffiking have led to out oc controll child kidnappning and rape. The problem is somewhat similar in India, Pakistan and China or Vietnam.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-13622679
http://www.iol.co.za/news/politics/easy-adoption-makes-sa-a-baby-supermarket-1.62804
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/nov/09/child-sexual-assault-epidemic-zimbabwe
http://www.trust.org/trustlaw/news/feature-child-marriage-a-scourge-for-millions-of-girls2
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/7371862.stm
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/8130900.stm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-13350757
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/3810425.stm
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/8621896.stm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-15267792
Ethiopian population is already around 80-90 million. Twice the size of neighbouring Kenya, and still growing with no end in sight! In 1981 however any kind of abortion was out of the question for my mother. Even today half of Ethiopian women cannot read or write(Amhara, wich is only used in Ethiopia)Back then the number was much closer to 80%
So abortion was out of the question. Ethiopia back then had no real “health care” what so ever even the in the capital Addis Ababa where i was born. My mother simply dumped me into the hospital and ran off. I never saw her again.
It is unclear why the communist government of Mengistu Haile Mariam allowed international adoptions in the first place after they were suspendet in 1974 The fact is, no one knows. Mengitsus government was very much anti west, and most of the so called “food aid” after 1984 went to Meles Zenavis CIA backed guerillas in the nothern parts of the country(Eritreat and Tigri) Mengitus government was anti west and pro Soviet.
Most likely it had nothing ever to do with “western pressure” or even food aid. Us “commie bastard babies” were seen as simply toxic waste, that needed to be disposed of. Abortion was illegal, and making it legal would atleast mean in THEORY that the government would have been compelled to invest huge sums of money into healthcare, wich it ofcourse was unwilling to do. We were regardet as simply toxic waste. Wheter we lived or died really meant nothing for the government. However already in the 1980’s there was a big “boom” to adopt “cute” Ethiopian babies. Christian missionaries voluntered to feed African children in exchange for there adoption. However it is a little suspicious why Mengitus har core anti god stalistic and andi west government never allowed western chsirtian missionaries to run around in the country even after the revolution and the great purges practicing christiany and feeding African children(only to ship them out of the country)
It would apear that the government had better things to do then to kick the christian missionaries out. It is clear that money also exhanged hands. Organisations like “save the children foundation” made surden “voluntary” donations to hospitals like the Black lion hospital, to keep the adoption business going steady.
Most Ethiopians today blame Meles Zenavis pro western government for the baby trade, but in reality Ethiopia had a functioning baby trafficking industry already since the 1960’s, far before the civil war, the great purges, or forexample the great Vollo famine(1973) Ethiopia even had it’s own adoption ministry.
It’s hard to understand such a perverse level of corruption, but then again, we have to also understand, that unlike white westerners, the Ethiopian people or the Ethiopian government do not see induvidual human life either as valuable or unique. The induvidual is simply a part of the brown swarm. From the position of the black leadership one member of the swarm is easily replaced and insignificant. Ethipiopia(do to the engire of child rape)is after all NEVER going to run out of people! Therefor fate of the individual is insignificant to out “great leaders”
The Adoption agreement was always extremely immoral and illegal. It was immoral to say the least, as ny mother was obviously raped, and denied any legal abortion. The communist SATANS insignia on my adoption papers and Ethiopian passport made it even more IMMORAL then it normally would have been!
In Finland the first laws regarding international adoption were passed in 1985 Adoption before that timeline was not illegal under Finish law, but there were no laws what so ever regarding international adoption. My Adoption was unilaterally aproved by a special Presidental seal and signature without the Finish parlament passing any law regarding the pratice in 1983
My adoption parents always regardet me as a housepet, and not as a real boy. Understanble, since i wasnt “real” or atleast not theres to begin with.
I was fed like a stuffed pig. However when i started asking questions regarding my origin, they mostly went unaswered. As time grew by i increasingly realized i was living in a prison. I was given everything but privacy in my own room, and the bevahior of especially my adoption mother increasingly became violent and hostile towards me.
My adoption mother used all kinds of manipulation and threats to make sure i would stay in a normal school. I had mental and neurological problems already at the time(i was around 6-8 years old) She threatened several principles and techers with here relations to the president and members of the Finish parlament. It was becoming increasingly clear that her will to adopt me had much more to do with surden politicans then the fact that she really loved me, or to the Finish law in general.
I learned from my adoption mother to use all kinds f drty tricks in life, including manipulating other people. At an early age of around 6-8 years old i began to realize, that i would have to find a way to escape my adoption family, but there was none! There was nowehere i could run or nowehere i could go!
I was a very strong atheist in my youth. I was also a materialist, as ai was raised as such. I never prayed to god.
Today that i have actually gotten to KNOW god i sometimes wonder was praying to him such a good idea to begin with. I never as a child understood that god actually DEMANDS things from peopple. Jesus talks about this in hes story of the talents given to 3 men.
As a child i was against praying to god out of principle. I didn’t want to acknowledge the existance of an invisble spiritual being. I saw it as illogical. I wanted to act just like a white person, and no white man would ever acknowledge something to stupid, so why would i?
Finally at a time when i was feeling panicked(not go into the details but it was a very panicky situation)i prayed god and Jesus christ for help. I lost my consiusness immidietly and woke up in the same hotel room the next day.
I refused to pray to god mostly do to the same reason i refuse to wear glasses today even tough im near sided;it’s NERDY! Real men dont do that! I refused to pray to him, listen to him, and finally i started mocking him! This was when my “parents” had sent me into a mental instituion at the age of 10 and finally into a family home at the age of 12
I must admit at the time i was very ego driven and full of myself. There was only ONE person at the time(age between 12-16)that i would never listen to;ME!
God abandoned me for a short time and in the family home i ran into a lot of trouble. When i finally remembered the broken promise i had given to him i started rebuilding my life from the scraps of the past, but it was a very, VERY hard thing to do!
At the age of around 18-years old living in a dormitary of the colledge of a shorts i started going back to the lost years of my life. I realized, that i was different from everyone else. That i was unique, but i never really understood how unique. That was the problem!
My adoptive parents hystericly wanted to hide there own incompetence and the fact, that they had made a mistake “adopting” me in the first place. They tried to convince there family and friends i was going through a “mid 20’s” identity chrisis or something. They wanted to most of all protect THEMSELVES from the fact, that THEY would end up being blamed for all my mental and neurological problems!
I mangaged to get into a good school, and was studying computer and computer related works. However something happened to me.
Up to that point i had always consideres myself to be an induvidual. A unique human being, and not just some randome “darkie” To whole ideal felt totally INSANE based on how i had always been treated. Even as a house ****** pet i always had a unique personality. No one would just treat me as some randome “darkie” based on how i look.
However at around the ages of 18-22 things suddenly started to change.
I began to gradually realize, that i was in a “new world” A very different Finland compared to my childhood in the 80’s and 90’s Infact it was an entely different Americanized world!
In the this world people always cared of what i looked. They werent interested at all about ME! The media was full of some stupid rap hip hop, wich i no way as a black NERD(well there, i said it)could relate to.
Later i began to realize all these new “chosen children” Finish people in there 30’s and 40’s were carrying around. I began to finally realize i was never a “true son” but nothing but a bought and payed housepet.
And that was really just the beginning!
It’s difficult to explain, but at a surden level you could say i “gained my sanity” and learned my place in the world the HARD WAY! The Finish media talked about some big ass “labour shortage” since around the year 2000. Ever since the mid 1990’s Finland has lost around 500 000-1000 000 jobs, so ofcourse i knew this was all totall BULLSHIT!
Black,s Asians and Eastern-European were being increasingly brought to Finland either as housepets or some kind of slaves in temporary working visas.
I began to realize that the “media” wasnt interested at all in reporting REAL ISSUES! That they lied frequently FOR A LIVING! The same way “Fat Ann” (not her real name)lied frequently about me being her son or her property based on same peace of paper with the communist SATANS insignia all over it!
And then i had a total mental break down as a part of this. When REALITY finally began to sink in, something in my just SNAPPED! I thought i would act “cool” by starting fight in the school dormatory, wich finally got me kicked out of there.
I went back to the small hillbilly neighbourhood to study auatomation being the only +20year old amongsts a bunch of racist teenagers. Needlers to say i atleast started considering suicide.
I had a short out of body experience, that wasn’t directly related to suicide. I came into a short contact with god.
It was a very…enlightening experience. But not something i recommend to anyone.
I was made to understand that people dont pray to god untill they are literally at the bottom of the barell. I would not even considering praying him myself, untill i was at the total bottom!
I saw a short of preview of my life and was made to understand(in a very LOVING WAY)that i had chosen this life experience MYSELF! At that point i didn’t year understand that i could also END IT MYSELF, if i never wanted to. My original suicide plan was to electrify myself.
I had been at a very low vibration level, and wanted to raise that vibration level in a short perdior of time. Vibration is basicly a level existance of consciousness. Gods name in Hebrew is Jahve, wich literally means “i am” He just kind of exists. Any existant that is self awafe by defition is divine.
Anyway he just said that he loved me. It was all that i needed to know. However i was too scared to ever talk about it anyone. It just made me extremely happy!
I didnt’ really pray to god, as i saw no reason to. I was just so happy to be esxcepted with that unconditional LOVE!
After i graduaded the Finish authorities put me on a kind of an early retirement. I became depressed and isolated myself in my room, and finally hurt myself.
I cant explain it, but i became posessed and crushed my testacle with a metal wand i was originally going to use for electrocution. This was exactly 12 months ago.
It is still very hard to imagine how exactly i got into the situation where i am today.
Originally i never really wanted to kill myself, or had any plans to do so.
When i had crushed my testacle the voices in my head went away. I was no longer possed, but still all alone in my room. I started praying to god and it changed my entire life!
God told me that i had arrived at a cross roads in my life. He would heal my broken testacle, and he did, but there would be a price!
I would have to go back and forgive my adopive parents for all the harm and abuse they had done to me!
It was the first time in my life i acted involuntarily against my will doing something like this, but i did. I discovered that Jake had cancer and her wife had some kind of cataract, so we prayed together. I calso contacted a good old friend of mine. A christian priest, and we prayed together as well for my recovery.
The doctors coulnd’t believe it, but my testacle grew back to normal. My testostorone level is very low, but that is linked to obesity and all the stress i’ve been having all the years. I also had trouble with potense relating to a rare neurologicalcondition, but i have been taking a medicine called Rinexin, so things have started to work out just fine;
http://www.retrogradeejaculation.net
Anyway i was praying to god again, and i aksed him to grant me a safe entrance back home. I was very depressed and afraid of growing old in a far away country all alone. Wich is when i found out about this lad and hes bizarre suicide method;
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2011/04/27/suicide-kits-the-91-year-old-woman-selling-instant-death-on-the-internet.html
Originally i never really wanted to help anyone else. I started posting about my ideas on this website. I have no idea how exactly people got a hold of my email adress considering i never really advertised it in anyway.
But i was more or less flooded with email messages BEGGINING me for help, wish resulted in the English and Finish guides being born.
There are some people out there who say i do this to “show off” and get fame. That i WANT to be the “suicide doctor” in order to “show off”
I can assure you this is not the case!
Personally i have found people on this website to predatory in nature. I was contacted for help even tough i myself never really knew all the answers. Some people who asked me for help turned out to be outright rude, trying to make ME carrie there burderns for them!
I have spoken to a girl whos broyfriend died using my method so i can assure you it is quite effective. However we are breaking ground here people!
The ******** mehhod is extremely knew. The reason for this quite frankly is…well, i will be quite honest.
The book Finla Exit came out in 2001 written by Dereck Humprey. I have a feeling that both Humprey and Philip Nitschke(author of the peacefull pill)had some ulterior motive as to why recommend childrends toyn tanks instead if industrial tanks to be used in the job!
The first person who i consulted was a man from Sotland who had tried suicide using childrens toy tanks such as these full of helium!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mCW7xuCFEQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsQUhpIxzAs
Lets just put it this way;BOTH of those tanks empy in 50-seconds. What kind of an ASSHOE would recomend using them?
What im trying to say here is this;contrary to popular opinion im not the Ethiopian macgyver, even tough im as nerdy an intelectual as they come. What im saying is that a 12-year old child using simple math could calculate, that Dereck Humpreys construction will FAILL! So why was it ever introduced or even promoted by people such as these?
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2010/mar/09/assisted-suicide-final-exit-network
What exactly is there agenda to agressively promote childrens toy tanks that are BOUND to faill based on simple math of balloon flow, calculating for example how long it takes balloons like these to fill…
based on the fact that we KNOW how many balloons(of 30 centimeters in diamater)fit into a tank of around 20-liters(thats european metric liters)in size!
So what exactly is there agenda to obviously give FALSE ADVICE!!?
http://www.freak-search.com/en/thread/2722575/buy_helium_flow_control_kit_in_europe
Look, im not saying that im a smart Ethiopian even tough i am. I am sure there are white people out there with a lot higher iq then what i have!
But why havent they come forward? These are obviously FALSE ADVICES giving people dangerous brain damage!
So what exactly is going on here?
What im basicly saying is this;somethings going on here folks!
Im not the super smart Ethiopian who has figured out the secret to peacefull death. Rather someone has an AGENDA to keep it away from the people!
The question is, what exactly is that agenda?
Lets put it this way folks;i know a lot about agendas. I was born as a result of child rape and trafficked to white child abusers against my will. So i know an “agenda” when i see one!
Someone has some kind of a deep desire to make sure the secret to peacefull death is not discovered!
Nicholas Kinoski for example used a 20-liter Helium tank, wich is why hes suicide attempt was successful!!
http://special.registerguard.com/web/newslocalnews/25946621-41/suicide-helium-humphry-kit-klonoski.html.csp
The question is why are these old wise white doctors promoting the use of toy tanks?
And please dont tell me that they have only now “seen the light” and turned away from there evil ways? You mean it took THIS LONG! Nearly 10-years?
Launch of new pamphlet on how to make a helium hood kit yourself
http://www.peacefulpillhandbook.com
Well technicly speaking(accoring to wikipedia) Mr Dereck Humprey wrote hes Final Exit book about Helium in the year 2000 And he just conviniently forgot to say anything about the amouth of gass needed, gass flow, or to run any actual TESTS with the gass! What a nice old guy;=))
Thats a bit like giving someone a gun to kill themselves but leaving out the bullets all together!
Somethings not quite right here folks!
No wonder god gave me as a final mission to write a clear and scientific English and Finish guide for peacefull death!
God told me that i wrote both the English and Finish guides formyself, to paticularly to study the issue oh ethics, wich is paticularly important to him. I also had a chance to help others right before i go. He says that is paticularly important to him. I will therefor leave something behind me, a legacy. A better world then what i entered. The secret to peacefull death!
God says that i can come back home now. You can call it an early christmas present if you want. All i ever had to do was to ask! But before i go, i must learn to forgive to those who have sinned against me. Suicide is a sin against god and all hes creation, but since Jesus Christ, the son of god and bore the ALL sins of this world, this sin will not be counted against me. This is why Jesus died on the cross;so i could come back to home to my creator!
Thank you Jesus that you have born all the sins of this world. Both what satan did to me, my mother, and for all the sins i have comited myself. Thank you for the great sacrifice you have born for this perverse creation! Thank you, for with the power of god i can finally break these chains of evil, that were cast on me bu SATAN! Now it is over;i have have already won! The spell of evil is finally BROKEN! Thank you Jesus Christ, my savior!
If anyone is still interested you can get my completed english guide at JonesHenry@hotmail.fi Thank you god that you have loved us so, as to give us this chance to leave peacefully. I know i will be taken in as the prodigal son when i return. Thank you for making all this possible. It has been a long, LONG tiering jorney!