I don’t know the point of this website.. but I’m feeling extremely helpless and alone at the moment and I googled I’m dying and this is where it brought me. I think about suicide every hour of every day, I don’t feel good enough to keep going at this point. I can’t talk about anything, my life is so complicated. I don’t feel like writing/typing/telling a novel so no one can help me.
I am in college, and everything was great and I felt like my life was finally on track and then all of a sudden one day I just wanted to die. The pressures that surround me everyday keep me from getting out of bed in the morning. I am in so much debt, for some reason it’s impossible to get a job where i live, I haven’t gone to class in weeks and I feel i’m too far behind to catch up. Everything is crumbling around me and I feel hopeless. None of my family wants anything to do with me, no one will help me. I am alone. I am nineteen years old and I can’t even summon the strength to get up in the morning and walk ten minutes down the street to sit in class. I have been completely antisocial lately.
I tried going to a counciller but I just feel like no matter how much I speak nothing is ever going to change. These feelings aren’t going to go away, no one is going to get me out of the debt that I’m in, no one in this world is compassionate enough to hire a girl desperate for a job just because they are broke and struggling, no one is going to make my mother love me, no one is going to make my father want a relationship with me. There is nothing left to care about, there is nothing left for me here. I’m so close to my breaking point now, I can feel myself getting weaker and weaker and caring less and less about everything and everyone in my life. I am not heartless, I am just so lost. I don’t think I’ll ever find my way.
6 comments
hey
I’m trying to.. find my way also,
Life is overwelhming alot of times, your not alone going thru these emotions. Many of the people in this world feel exactly the same way.
You may want to try and see if there are any debt support groups near by, I don’t know if there is such a thing.
Nobody ever called me out of the blue to give me a job, ….. each one I had to get out of the house and go an fill out applications, yet that was when the economy was different than now.
I know how u feel. It like when it rains, it doesn’t pour it hurricanes!!! I know how it feels to want your mom to love u and b part of your life and not having family to support u. Life can b overwhelming and before u know u feel lost!!
Yeah, I know for sure I am not the only one feeling this way. But I also feel like I deserve to be happy and I feel like no one is really giving me a chance. I feel like everything that happens to me either starts off negatively or needs to be harder than it actually is. Nothing has ever come easy to me.
As for the job thing, I have gone to job fairs, handed out resumes, spoken to managers, and I’ve been told on many occasions that I will definitely get hired, I have called places numerous times asking what is going on and in the process I have never been hired. It’s all very confusing to me. I need a job, I have a great resumes, lots of experience, and I feel I would be great for any job but nothing has happened.
Life is definitely overwhelming, sometimes I feel like it would be easier to give up but I probably never will.
Change everything …travel ..come to any country ..I live in a different country I can have u till u find a way