Reality has stricken

  November 3rd, 2011 by deadreality

My fantasy world is gone, what I had made of the world to keep me happy is gone. Nobody in the world understands me. I feel distant from my family. What was once unity, is now one son, one member isolated and confused, me. Nobody expects me to suicide. But for the last 3 years, i have had countless suicide thoughts. Is it for the attention, no. Is it to send a message to those who don’t care for me but will then; maybe. Or is it because I’m sick of the fakeness, the stupidity, the judgement, of our society. How the government fucks with our heads, propaganda bullshit. In any case, I was tired of everything. Took the butcher knife, put it steadily against my neck, then my wrist, which one should I do? Which one should i fucking do, huh? I don’t know, im a confused ************, I just want to go to a far university, stay isolated, do my work. If anyone fucks with me, i’ll do ???? something you can’t imagine. Maybe i have issues, don’t we all do. Maybe i have the potential to be a psychopath. Too many fucking maybes, thats why its time to cut it and i did, wrist looked like a puddle of blood shit. Unluckily, i was found and unfortunately saved, by someone at a bad time. Why am i sharing this, does anyone give a shit. I don’t think so, and i don’t care. im doing this so someone who goes on this computer can see it when i’m hanging from the roof. There are no methods of suicide here, is that what im supposed to say? Well there isn’t and if anyone wants to do it, do it. Only thing that can save me is, a couple L’s just to put me in peace and then say goodbye to 2011, one year before everything obliterates. REMEMBER PEOPLE, REALITY IS RIGHT, DREAMS ARE NOT FOR REAL. if you have a fucked up life, you do and accept it.

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