my dad is an alcoholic he’s been sober since before thanksgiving. This Christmas he started drinking. And has been since. I obviously hatE when he’s like that. Like why does he need to be drinking. Why does he need to start drinking. I hate him. He absolutely had an affect on me and made me how I am. I don’t even understAnd why he started drinking in the first place. I don’t remember him drinking when we still lived in lithuania. Its confusing to me. Its one of the reasons I hate being at home. Especially when he’s like that. Well all in all it has a direct affect to me wanting to kill myself. So i guess it is his fault someway. I can’t even talk to him when he’s like that. I just can’t even express how much I hate it.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
13 comments
People drink/take drugs because they don’t have the resources or abilities to cope with problems in a practical way. It’s temporary escapism, but any problems that may exist will still stay there once yu become sober.
It’s a complex reason why people seek to escape but the bottom line is that ~ an inability or lack of resources to deal with problems.
Don’t blame him or yourself or life. You have a choice on whether to stay positive and strong and productive. Maybe he can learn something from you?
Sometimes it’s the things that go unsaid that are the most poignant and relevant. The things that go unsaid for fear of how someone would respond by getting angry at us.
I can relate. I recently wrote a letter to my dad expressing my feelings. It was from my heart, it didn’t go over well at first. But as a bit of time passed, I got the opportunity to write him again letting him know how much he meant to me and how important a person he was in my life…this is big stuff.
I don’t think you hate him, I’d say you’re disappointed cause he’s your dad and you’d think he would be a good, strong, loving example for you…but he’s letting you down.
Everyone is entitled to their feelings. I would refrain from encouraging you to do one thing or the other, but I will say, it makes a difference when the truth is off ones chest and it may jolt your dad so as to realize what’s really important. Some people simply can’t drink without going overboard, or he has so much hurt that’s the way he numbs his own pain….my dad did that for years. Your feelings are worth being heard and there’s no need for you to bottle them up inside yourself…you’re too freakin’ lovely for that….Take care!
adastra- well he does have childhood problems that haven’t been dealt with. he was abandoned by his parents and they died pretty early in his life (before he has 15 i think). he doesnt talk about that at all. everything that i know, my mom told me. and problems never do disappear. and my mom tells him that all the time, and he knows it. but its just hard not to blame him, because i know he can be better than that.
softsoul-i have fears of letting people around me know how i feel. my parents have no idea about my thoughts of killing myself. so it would be pretty difficult for me to tell him how i feel. he is letting me down. and by drinking he’s also pushing everyone around him away. i just dont understand why he’s doing so. he knows it too.
thanks for reading by the way.
I feel your pain. My dad was an alcoholic. I remember feeling confused and hurt when I was younger. People would tell me he had a disease and couldn’t help it. I thought that sounded like BS. I remember when he was on a major bing I told him he was going to lose everything if he couldn’t stop. He didn’t stop and the day after my 20th birthday I found him dead.
Fast forward 11 or 12 years and it was my turn to cause pain. After drinking over and over and over again my family lost trust in me.My ten year old cried bc he scared and confused him.
The thing I have learned is that my dad wasn’t drinking bc he didn’t care about me. He drank bc he was an alcoholic. We drink to the point where all we feel is our addiction. And the things we love are lost in the background of our disease.
I know things are painful but don’t give up. I know you feel all messed up on the inside and if u are like I was you probably are, but things often get better.
ericjarvis22- i hope i dont have to see my father dead. im sorry that happend to you. do you believe that addiction is inherited or just learned by seeing? i really want him to stop but it just never happens.
I only meant for you to express, that his drinking is hurting you…only share what you feel comfortable sharing with others. Btw you can’t you can leave your body but you can’t kill yourself…just so you know…take care.
I am 100% sure that there is a genetic predisposition to being an alcoholic. But the good thing about this mental disorder is that I never have to drink again. I may want to, and sometimes I feel like circumstances will make me, but if I can stay sober eventually things will start to feel better. I have never been suicidal, but I imagine addiction and depression have similarities.
What do you think?
By the way, I hope you dad doesn’t die either; most alcoholics don’t. I wasn’t trying to scare you. I just want you to know its not your fault. You didn’t make him that way and you can’t “fix” him.
wait what!? DAMN IT! I DON’T WANT TO BE AN ALCOHOLIC!!!
what does predisposition mean?
Pre-disposition means you’re more susceptible to alcoholism. But if you don’t want it, you don’t have to be one!
what if i already drink?
Alcoholism is a progressive disorder. The longer you drink the worse it gets. You will be a lot better off if you stop now versus waiting years from now. It will cause your dark place to get a lot darker.
Of course you may not be an alcoholic.
predisposition; a liabitility or tenedendency to act a certain way. (Look it up. We live in the computer age).