Why do you hate me?

December 10th, 2011by loveismurder

Why do you turn good, innocent things into wrong, into sin?  Why do you have to fuck with my mind to the point that even happiness causes me to want to pull the trigger?  I should not have to deal with this.  You tell me you treat me like an adult, but I have to wait until you’re long asleep to do what I want, without you looking over my shoulder.  And as a parent you are supposed to help me through life, be there for me when no one else is, give me advice.  But no you slap this nonsense religion in my face and expect it to solve all my problems.  What if I don’t believe?  What would you do?

I wish you would just hit me already, give me a black eye.  Because no one can see this kind of abuse.  It may as well not even exist.  Then they would know.  They would understand why I can’t deal with my life.  They would understand my pain.  But you wouldn’t, not unless I provoked you to do so.   And then when I do move away?  Will I be happier?  Will you still control my life?  Will I let you?

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