I want to talk about my feelings, but nobody around me seems capable of handling them, and those that do just want to put me in the hospital. I don’t know, maybe I should go back into the hospital for a few days. Before, I just was bent on hanging myself, it was a dissociative wave where little logic ever intervened. Now, I don’t think I want to do it, but when I get really down I’m not so sure. Yesterday I tried it again. Not serious, just hanging around (arg…) with my ligature. I did hang myself with it a couple of times, but with little pressure and little willpower. I stopped as soon as I saw my eyesight go wonky. I did that, perhaps, 3-4 times. Call me an idiot if I’m wrong, but I think now I understand this cutting thing that young people do sometimes. They cut, I hang, for the same reason. Or…I could be completely daft. Opinions?
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6 comments
If you want to hang yourself..go hang gliding or jump out an airplane..have a little fun u know. People die in freak accidents. Id say most people on here are just afraid to die..live without fear cause death is always near. For the person that wants to cut themselves..maybe they can make somethings from wood or maybe cut hair. I suggest eat some icecream..sugar is always good.
Are you doing it for pain or to feel closer to the actual thing? Sometimes the closer I am the calmer I feel, and some people cut to feel calm, so in that way it would be similar. And the same if it’s to hurt. The hospital sounds like it could be a good idea. It’s not like you’d be in there for long, and you’re free to talk in there. It’s probably the best place to go for more immediate help (rather than talking to friends or doctors).
Lots of people do attempt and sometimes succeed when they’re not really sure about it… If hospitals don’t help you mentally at least you’re physically further away from being able to attempt. It sounds like you’re better than you were, but still much too close for it not to be an issue. I think I’d recommend the hospital. It seems the best time to go back, when you’re well enough to consider it. Good luck, whatever you decide 🙂
Self-harm is self-harm regardless if it is cutting, burning, hanging, ect. It is all the same
i agree protoryu.re self harm….there are endless forms, often ones people dont even realize.
try remember also that not everyone around will or has the right skills/abilities to talk about emotions and mental health issue’s. It’s a bit like talking to your grandma about the internal combustion engine or thermodynamics. She will most likely look startled, and go silent because ‘she’ has nothing worthwhile to say, or she may just say, ‘thats nice dear’.
Try understand ‘other people’ arent experts and thats okay. Older generations also were never taught to communicate well so not their fault.
If you want to talk about issue’s, feel free to chat ..
Ad Astra
Anything that causes harm to you and you do it to yourself is considered self-harm. If you wanna talk, feel free to message me at farmerstrong13@hotmail.com. I’d love to talk to you. 🙂
It’s been a week since I got ripped a new asshole by the Director, for having the gumption to ask the Dean for help. Nothing bad has happened, yet. My boss, the Chair of the School of IT, is back from his trip. He recommends that I go tell the Dean I’m fine. I’ll do that tomorrow. But it’s grating on me, grinding me down, to be scared to go to work and depressed when I get home. Sure, I am doing my job as best I can, but I’m afraid every day all the time. Maybe I just need to sleep. Now my son is up, rambling about something indeterminate. He’s part of the reason I’m this way and I feel guilty and helpless about it. I think part of me is hoping that I screw it up and hang myself. I’m really tired, I should go to bed. I feel stuck.