When you first get on to this site, they send you to the read this first page, then to [http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/]
That site recommends that you talk to someone, anyone. A hotline, a friend, family member, or religious member…
But what happens when you’re too afraid to call, or don’t have access to a phone when you are ready to turn the switch?
what happens when you’re too young to feel so old and no family member wants to even acknowledge you’re their vicinity when you’re depressed?
what happens when the man you’re in love with is too controlling and you’re not allowed to even have a friend to talk to, even if you’d wind up ending you’re life after keeping EVERYTHING inside yourself? But you would rather him have his peace of mind and end you’re life and prevent the growing life inside of you from having to enter this world full of hate…
What happens when the same man that you cant bear to leave because his love is what keeps you going is eventually going to find this site, find you’re posts then yell until you cant feel unless there’s blood running from you’re wrists and other various parts that can only make you feel more dead then alive?
What happens when you don’t have the money to go to therapy and don’t qualify for any financial aid? And even if you did there would be no one willing to take you so you could better your health, and the babys?
what do you think the administers would do if they were still in the position they were in they stated thesuicideproject?
What would happen when you cant get away from the voices in you’re head, the constant thoughts and the controlled life but the life-form feeding off every last bit of energy you have is the only thing giving you energy and reason?
Who can I talk to? What happens now? Do I stay and suffer along with everyone else or do I stop our heartbeats and save this fetus from a certain distorted life?
7 comments
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do you have an email? i want to share something with you
Hey, to be honest i never read the page they directed me to. when u too afraid to call them u come to us. u post here and we will do our best to help, if u need an email adress for anyone u found helpfull ask for one so u can talk to them one on one. I cnat comment on ur relationship save to say that i think u should leave him. im guessing he controlls all the money, rent etc is in his name. thats to stop u leaven, he wants to have u completely dependant but the fact ur here shows ur not under his thumb. u want to rebel from this looser nd u must, if not for ur sake then for ur childs. does he hit u? Id recomend setting up a new email address. one he knows nothing of, with a password he doesnt know. wipe the history of the computer but only the sights like this and a new email site. remove all trace that u on here from the computer nd do ur best to hide it from this idiot u love. Ur child deserves the chance of life, u never know what type of life it can have. if u are intent on dying than wate till the child is born at the very least. hope this helped, stay strong xx
word
just don’t have a kid with him, trust me.
Oh shit, I’m an asshole and didn’t read the last line. Ok so you’re in the same situation I was in 3 years ago. Get help so you don’t end up in the situation I’m in. Tell your parents, force yourself to make a secret online friend… anything. I’m ruining my kids life because I couldn’t do that and now its too late.
I’m sorry that last comment was messed up.
@x-boy
my email is Onlyviolet7@Yahoo.com
I cant leave him I love him and I’m seeing him again today because he has court on tuesday, and I clear my site history everyday, he doesn’t hit me but he abuses me in every other way. I don’t live with him, I live win my mother who went through almost the same thing with my stepfather. Ive seen what it does to kids babies and pregnancies. But I still cant leave. He knows where I live and the.little money I make he takes it and spends it on marijuana, booze, or other unnecessary things.
This is the 4th time ive been pregnant with him. One me step father made me abort, the next was a miscarriage, the one after that I really wanted to keep and he told me that I would be a horrible mother and he doesn’t want me to do what My father did to me to HIS baby, and he would leave me if i kept it, So he made me abort that child too. The one after was a miscarriage. Now I’m pregnant again and he doesn’t know yet. I’m too afraid to say anything and be told those things.
I want to be a good mother but I cant do it with him and I cant do it without. He basically lives with me and my mom, and does nothing all day but sell and smoke weed while I’m at school. Because hes older I feel he has all power over me and if I leave I don’t know where I would go and how I would care for the child. I don’t want to resort back to prostitution, which is what I did before him, and I want my baby to have his/her father…
If Im not a good person, how could I be a good mother?
After attempt after attempt since I was 14 nothing seems to work and I cannot get the thought of not seeing light or having to feel out of my head. I want it so bad and the only thing holding me back is the other life inside of me. But then again I want to save him/her from the pain of this horrid life. A life with me, and a life with his/her father.