two more life steps and I get to end it all with as little hard feelings as possible.
1. save up nest egg for brother
2. kill self
simple; I don’t care anymore how I earn the money, just that I do. I’m putting this out to my universe so that it sinks deepeer into my brain. I don’t give a fuck about existence. I want out. The things that go on around me, this life, this society of “civilized” apes.. me nah want it. fuck it. keep it. don’t need it. don’t want perception. don’t want a brain. don’t want to know anything. non-existence, c’est ca la veritee, non-existence.
Two steps and I’m there; doesn’t matter how I act between now and death. Remember Tyrone, YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK 😐 You mentally divorced reality long long ago so let it go, let it grow without you. Gte your brother what he needs to survive, because god knows that your mother won’t, and then get out. Get the fuck out of here. That complete nothing feeling inside is the indication that you are indeed ready to go. Stop being so afraid and tired because you’re done. Doesn’t matter what happens around you cause you’re done, maxed out, finished. Soooo? be cool 🙂
1 comment
I mean: I’ve been feeling way better these last weeks BUT I still want to be out of this twisted game .. like it was my destiny to leave by my own hands
it’s scary to take that step because what seems like the natural, only outcome to your situation willl hurt loved (or rather loving) ones & you wish they could understand & not make a big deal out of it