I posted on monday, saying that i will overdose on medication and i actually did that. I did a suicide attempt on tuesday. Well, i actually knew i was going to survive because i knew the pills weren’t enough to make my heart stop beating. I took 19 pills of efexor with cough syrup. I went to school and they’ve called an ambulance there. It was to late to empty my stomach. When i was in the hospital they’ve let me drink something that looks like black waterpaint with sand. It didn’t tasted but the feeling was awful and they’ve took soom blood. They wanted to let me go to the psychiatry but i really don’t want to go for a few reasons.
Mainly because of school. If i go to the psychiatric then that means i will leave school for about 6+ weeks. That means that i’ll have to do my school year over and i really don’t want to do that. My school results aren’t great but i’d rather want to try and succeed this school year. I will commit suicide anyway if i have to do my year all over again.
Secondly because when someone says psychiatry, (I’m not sure how they call that in English) but i think of a fools house. Where the most sickest persons are there.
So i really don’t know what to do now.
6 comments
That black stuff was charcole mixed with water, it detoxifies your blood, it probibly saved your life. I had two of those in transfusions and i had to drink it once aswell.
Why did try to kill yourself?
If i could go through school again i would, i would make alot of changes if i could, your still young you havent had those decisions yet.
If i could go back i would study my ass off and i would become a doctor or someone who could help people.
Why would you do an attempt as a cry for help?
I do not understand… I know you must be hurting and wanting a way out, but you gotta know that there is SO much more to life than this. like… you need to get out of your head and start working out and hiking, thennnnnnnnn don’t be so stupid to go to school. No one there is going to feel sorry for you. You are only screwing up your own life and you need to be the one to fix it, not break it, life will do that for you.
So stupid to go to school and try to die… ***
calling someone stupid doesn’t really help.
Are we here to help, or here to shoot people straight? uhm. Freedom of speech and it is stupid.
@G4M3r9irl I respect you and think you have given some really great advice here,I didn’t mean to sound rude at all,i’m sorry if it came across that way.i guess,i’ve done a lot of things in my life that i regret,and when i was asking for help,in my experience it was harder for me if people continued to point out what i’d done wrong when i already knew it was a mistake,like the whole reason i was asking of help was because i knew i had made a mistake in the first place,so having them tell me again just hurt me worse.i think it just struck a cord with me and i replied without thinking,I didn’t interpret what you were saying correctly,maybe i took it in the wrong context.i’m sorry,clean slate? 🙂
@Wei Se I think the most important thing is your health,always. once things are better then it will be much easier to focus on school.have you talked to your teachers,isn’t there some way they could figure something out?