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by fallencrescendo

People just don’t take me seriously. I must be that good of an actress. I try to put on a smile everyday so no one nags me about my problems.

Today in class, we went over the symptoms of depression; Yeah, they all sounded just about right. I know I’m depressed, and no one else knows that. I am showing the symptoms, but would anyone even care to take notice? No.

“Ask for help” should be the first thing to do right? Well I did. I requested to see a therapist. I told my aunts and they said “Sure we’ll find you one.” Two years later, I’m here. Thinking about suicide constantly. I’ve tried planning it out. I have an idea. Just trying to find the right time to do it. And better reasons. Only two reasons why I’m still here…

My little brothers, 6&7. I want to stay here to protect them; to make sure they don’t go through what I went through. To take care of them, to watch them grow up, and to be there for them so they can come to their big sister whenever they’ll need any help. THAT is my ONLY reason. THAT is why I am here today. We’ll see how this goes…..

-A.C

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hated-one 4/4/2012 - 4:52 am

what you’ve got to understand is that depression is very hard to identify by the people who haven’t experienced it. one question that dwells in my mind is what happened between the therapist and now that made you feel so terrible

fallencrescendo 4/5/2012 - 8:44 pm

I never saw a therapist. They gave up on the idea.

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