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My last day online will be 05/31/2012. My last actual day … not soon enough.  And if anyone tries to pull that stuff that someone did with Biscuit on here, it is not going to work with me so do not waste your time.

A few more weeks and I’ll be out of here.  One of my methods is already procured and the two backups are on their way.  Terminated my employment a week ago so it is daily inundation in books, games, movies and music until the end.  Since the job is done and the methods are going to be present, no turning back now.

Everything is given away except my favorite entertainment items, the necessary appliances for comfort and a couple of futons.  The house is very empty.  Then again never had much in it to begin with.   Well not as far as the normal decorations/photos similar stuff you see in the average homes.  Never was much for sentimental stuff. 

Going to spend the next week with my nieces and nephews.  Spoiling them rotten as usual.  Sponsoring the adults in my immediate family(blood and adopted)for a three day weekend adventure on what they enjoy.

Leaving the house to my little brother in care of the family.   He’s on his third marriage now and may be having more kids.  Going to visit the children’s hospitals one last time.  And maybe hang out with my transient brethren in their gathering places.  Hit some of my old artsy fartsy locales I used to frequent.

End every evening with a glass of Glenlivet, a Cuban, some Lovecraft or Poe and Mozart or Marilyn Manson. 

My only regret will be that I cannot erase the memories of my existence in the minds of all who have ever known me.  Hoping there is no afterlife but if there is I am going to find my cousin and my son and we are going to cause havoc all over the multiverse.  As well as create our own dimensions specifically to what we want.

To all that still have hope, live for yourself first because that will sustain you.  Create whatever meaning you want in life even if it consists of fart jokes, following Buddha, and supporting Ron Paul.  And there are many on this site and in life who will help and support you.

To those on my path, just make sure that you are ready.  And I wish you a peaceful and painless journey.

And to Nat, I’m sorry dear.  Could not hold on any longer.

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12 comments

the Guardian 5/4/2012 - 9:05 am

What happened with biscuit ?

Astrid 5/4/2012 - 9:25 am

Too bad this site does not allow sharing any methods. But I’d really like to know what do you plan to do that is effective. I hope that if there is an afterlife indeed where you do get to create your own dimensions like you call it. I do not know your reasons, but I understand how you feel. I do not think I am quite ready yet- need to take care of stuff for my family for a while still. I am pretty sure I will end my life eventually. These feelings of despair and loneliness and self-pity no antidepressant can take away. Because it’s not a matter of how I feel and perceive my surroundings, but it’s reality. I am sick of hoping and waiting and trying to self-hypnotize myself to feel better. In the end, it’s all a big lie.

Wish you well whether in this life or the other or in a non-existent possibility.

Duke of Marmalade 5/4/2012 - 9:29 am

Not even going to let me buy you a beer?

Astrid 5/4/2012 - 9:30 am

I just read all your posts and I like your writings. I absolutely agree. Too bad you won’t be writing them for much longer. Good luck

Dawg 5/4/2012 - 9:39 am

respect to you Owen

all the best

dawg

solace 5/4/2012 - 10:37 am

This post is very beautiful. I think i will print it off and read it when i feel lonely (if you don’t mind).
I wish you could write a few more heart felt pieces like this before you die. I would be very interested in reading them.
Have a safe and peaceful journey to wherever you end up 🙂

ksa 5/4/2012 - 12:56 pm

“My only regret will be that I cannot erase the memories of my existence in the minds of all who have ever known me.”

If you mean what I think you do, it’s painful.. but you have a good heart.

“To all that still have hope, live for yourself first because that will sustain you. Create whatever meaning you want in life even if it consists of fart jokes, following Buddha, and supporting Ron Paul. And there are many on this site and in life who will help and support you.”

This is a beautiful message! But you seem like a quite humorous person 🙂 I’ll definitely try making fart jokes like Jake Vale on Youtube, if everything else fails!

R.I.P.

U.N. Owen 5/4/2012 - 5:48 pm

@Guardian
Someone reported him to the authorities.

@Astrid
Email me at gouki99x@gmail.com… will let you know
And that is a very noble reason… for family…. hopefully things change for the better for you before you choose to go.

@Duke
If you know a good online bar my friend.

@Dawg
Respect to you as well. Very good posts BTW.

@Solace, I will try my best to wirte more positive things for my SP family. Bet on it.

@ksa
Well yes. Sucks to have people miss you. I am sure many of us know the pain of a loved one being gone.

You do that… laughing is always better than crying.

Just a grave health issue came up. If it resolves itself, who knows.
You folks take care of our children, teens and young adults on here.
They really need it in this world.

Dawg 5/4/2012 - 7:05 pm

I try … gotta pass on all the clutter in my brain to those who still have time to make use of it 😉

jeopardy dawg

Irrompible 5/7/2012 - 1:50 pm

I have a hard time reading this and being able to say bye or RIP cuz I know you shouldn’t go 🙁 instead I will go read some of your posts and try to understand what you are going through and pray that you don’t leave

julieta 5/8/2012 - 1:16 am

travel to pakistan

Nat.... 5/17/2012 - 3:57 pm

… It’s ok, I understand. I just wish I could make you stay… I really need you.
:/ <3.

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