Fuck my life.

I’m 13. Lately, I’ve had a lot of stuff going on in my life, and here goes. Once I started secondary school, I started to get bullied, my hair looked greasy which was natural. I got called either ‘Greaseball’ or ‘Frying Pan’. It was horrible. My whole school called me it. It started to wear off. Once it wore off, I had a perfect life. My mum had just given birth to my baby brother and sister which were twins (Aged 1). I thought I had everything, I did. Then I started making new friends, and one of them I just loved. We started talking over the summer from my first year going into second. We texted, and constantly talked on Facebook. 24/7. Once we started our second year, we talked face to face. We were best friends. Later on, about a month later, me and him started going out, it was amazing. I’d never had someone care about me as much as he did. But as soon as we started going out, I’d got in trouble a lot, I never paid attention in class as I was texting him. I’d went from top of the class right the way to the bottom. I was the worst person in my year. That’s when I started getting screamed at. My mum had kept getting phone calls from my school complaining that I hadn’t done my work. That’s when I started self-harming myself. When I started, I just couldn’t stop, it was so addictive. I done it, and then my boyfriend found out. He was horrified. I started using my cut in half bus pass to self harm my arm. I started doing it in class. All my friends saw me doing it, do did my classroom assistant, but she came over to me and said ‘You’re mums going to kill you for ripping your jumper!’ my jumper was ripped both arms, and luckily she hadn’t saw my arm. The next day, in my form class, my head of year came to me and demanded me to show her my arms. She had bring me to my school councillor and. Now go there 2 days a week. She then rang my parents, and told them what I was doing. They were disgusted. LIater on that week, I got dared to wrap a hairband around my Finger until it went purple, so I did. Then my classroom assistant spotters it and dragged me to my he’s of year, and from then I had to tell her all of my problems, she helped me, abit. Then when I cut myself again in class last period, I started shaking, I wouldn’t stop, I went very pale, and found it hard to breath. I was really scared. After that, I had stopped self-harming.. But once the school bullies found out about me doing It and then walked round pretending to cut this wrists and start shouting ‘IM GEORGIA AND I CUT MY WRISS!!!’ I ran home every day crying my eyes out. That’s when the nicknames started. ‘Emo Slut’. I hated it. Then I started thinking of killing myself. I had told my boyfriend I would,but he told his mate, and his mate told everybody. That’s when I started getting called an attention seeker. Then, my boyfriend dumped me, and I began self-harming again. Since then, wr’ve been fighting a lot. And when w fought, I cut myself. Just to see how much it bleeds. Then everybody started to hate me, I had 0 friends. I had nothing. I then started to write a suicide note. I couldn’t cope anymore. I had 2 pairs of scissors and a knife in my desert and I could hear it calling my name. I wanted to die. I grabbed the knife, and as soon as I was about to dag I got a text, it was from one of my friends. He said ‘STOP! Look outside’ he was outside in the pourin rain. He came and helped me. He stopped me from killing myself, but I have still been trying to kill myself, and I just don’t know what to do now.