no happy ending.

I’m 15. I’m a female. And here’s a story that really changed me.

It was a sunny day. Me and my friend were excited so we went riding with our bikes around the block. Lame, I know. But we were only 10. Anyway, some of our classmates lived on that block. We were talking and riding when one of our classmates, Daisy, sees us and yells, “Come! Karina is here!” Karina is another one of our classmates and a close friend.

We went in and we saw that she was there with 4 guys. Let’s name them Tom, Bobby, Chris and Daisy’s brother, Matt. We thought “Oh, cool. Boys.” But once again, we were only 10. We didn’t know much about boys yet. We thought is would be cool to do what they do in the movies, play spin-the-bottle. We played but no one actually kissed, just on the cheek. There is also another game that we played, seven minutes in heaven. At first, I was like, “Ok, whatever.” Because I didn’t really understand it and I wanted to see what would happen. There was 4 boys and 4 girls so we all got paired up with someone and instead of going into a closet one at time, we chose a spot in the house and that’s where we would go with our partner. Karina refused to do anything with Chris though. She knew more about boys than we did at the time.

I was with Matt. Our “spot” was in his room (this was at his house). I thought it would be innocent. I thought Matt was cute, so I hoped that we would just talk for a while then eventually kiss, i was happy with the thought that he was gonna be my first kiss. Well, he immediately got on top of me and started making out with me. I thought he was being playful and silly at first, but then when I tried to get up, he pushed me down. I told him to stop, but he didn’t. I kept telling him, “Stop, Matt. Stop! I need to go home now!” He didn’t listen. He kissed my neck and I looked to my left, I saw my friends all standing there at the door, watching and laughing. I yelled at them to help me, to get him off me. But they didn’t. Some left to the living room, others stayed and watched. I wanted to cry, I felt disgusting. I didn’t know what to do, he started touching me and groping me. I would hit him with little chubby fists but he didn’t even flinch or anything. I looked over and saw my friends again, still giggling by the door. I wished I’d never come. He starts to touch my waist, where my pants are at. I freaked out and I pinched him somewhere on the chest or arm. I guess it hurt him because he straighten his back and said “ow.” I pushed him and he fell back. I ran as fast I could out of that room. I ran through the hall, the living room, and out of that house. I got on my bike and I went straight to my friends house. I felt like he was chasing me, I knew he wasn’t though.

When I got there, I was out of breath and scared. She asked me how it was, I wondered, “how did she know?” But then I remembered she was there, she was one of the people standing by the door, laughing. I was so mad at her, I thought she was my real friend. I thought all them were my friends. But I thought wrong. I yelled at her and asked her why she didn’t help me. She didn’t say anything. I was angry so I just left. I got home and I showered. I know it wasn’t rape, I’m not sure what it was. But it scarred me. And I felt disgusting. Dirty, gross, used.