On the outside I’m like everyone else.. Something people envy. A high school cheerleader, soccer player, straight A student, and have great friends… But it’s not that simple!
Every day I get taunted by people I get told I’ll never be good enough I’ll never be in their crowd. I try not to let it show but it’s hard I’ve worked so hard to get people to like and accept me. I spend so much money on designer clothes and the new shoes.. But it’s not good enough I stand in the hallway with hundreds of kids around me yet I feel more alone than ever. I can’t explain it..
I try to go home to get away from it all yet I come to a place where I am more unwanted and unloved.. My brother is put on the golden pedastle and I always have to live up to his standerds the star soccer player with a 30 ACT score and I am a disappointment to my family.. They have told me they should have aborted me..
I have a gun at home unlocked and loaded.. I have 3 bottles of precipitation pills.. Unopened and ready.. I feel if I were to end it people would actually know I existed.. They would actually see what they did wrong to me.. They would actually care..
I can’t talk to anyone about this and it only makes it worst.. I fell unwanted anyways so why not just end it all..