I finally made an account. I’ve spent all afternoon reading and I identify entirely with feeling like I’m in a slump. The worst part as I see it is the apathy. The complete loss of excitement for all the little things that used to make me smile and worse yet, the utter lack of care for whomever’s emotions will be affected by my last action on this earth.
I’m 21, completely hopeless, and scared for what lies ahead. I don’t want to disappoint my wife of four months, but with all the fighting I think she’d be better off. I seldom socialize anymore, I dropped out of uni, I hate arguing with my wife, and I hate being a nuisance to her. I wish I didnt feel so negative about all this. I know that with some hard work I can turn it all around but I have no will to do it. I’m standing here facing oblivion, and you know what, it seems kind of nice compared to the uncertainty that life will bring me.
I just needed to get some of that off my chest. Thanks for listening.
2 comments
Life is scary isnt it?
I don’t mean to be judgemental but please, try to put yourself in her shoes before doing anything .. I know too well apathy is a ***** but you just married her and (I’m assuming) she doesn’t know you’re thinking of killing yourself
it’d fuck up her self-esteem, probably more than you can imagine