Lost Forever

July 31st, 2012by lostinhorrer

Okay so i have been through therapy and it made everything worse. I don’t know how to deal with all the voices inside my head telling me what i need to do i am a dyslexic fifteen year old I’m going to be a junior and i don’t want to even see tomorrow. This will be long but i have a lot of reasons i want to disappear.

One is my sister she always puts me down and makes me feel like i don’t belong in the world i wish i could tell here shes a stupid ***** and doesn’t deserve to even see me let alone talk to me.

I also get picked on for being dyslexic. So now i have to live with my sister and being retarded and dumbI go to my parents but they never understand i want to be okay again and they put me in therapy i don’t like therapy it doesn’t do anything but make me feel worse about myself i want to be okay and go threw the world happy

People always say that i have a perfect life well my dad has cancer and he pushes himself and my mom is never home. I have one best friend i always see but i also have one i never see he started the thing in my head i usto  think about y life and that was it now i think how he could die at any second and if he died i would in my heart a little too. I wish he would stop drinking and smoking and drive more safely but he wont listen to me. I wish i could make them stop talking about him in my head but i go from my sister to him to me to my dad and i don’t know what to listen to anymore. i have nightmares almost everynight because i dont know wat to do about them.

If i get help i will just be put on medication that i don’t need and i cant do that, i wish the voices in my head would go away and i don’t think they will there is no escape i don’t know what to do anymore. is there anyone who can give me advice on what to do and how to make them all stop running through my head I just want to explode and my head i cant concentrate!!!!

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