is it any wonder that so many opt out of grinding for gold and leveling up for the sake of leveling up?
I’m so bored of it, and it’s my own fault. Life can be great if you’re open to it, but I’m not. I’m so afraid of people, coming into contact with them. I get debilitating diarrhea when I’ve gotten too anxious thanks to my IBS. I want to smile and laugh and be merry, but 1) I’m afraid and 2) I think people in general are dull. I’m 26 so I can’t have met that many people, but I’m already burnt out from the experience of socializing.
All it is is different faces repeating the same things over and over again; nothing new, or interesting, or topical. No, let’s discuss who’s having a baby shower this weekend or the fun things to do in the sun. I’m just so bored of speaking to these NPC’s; I’ve been bored and have all but stopped conversing with anyone that doesn’t have anything to do with my main quest.
I barely acknowledge my co-workers anymore, putting out the bare minimum amount of energy into maintaining small talk and half smiles. My cell phone stays off so friends can’t call me at their leisure for outings they know I wouldn’t be comfortable in. I try and try and try but I just realized recently that I don’t enjoy any of the things that I go out and do because they all center around sitting and talking about random BS. I’d rather invest my time in my main storyline than waste it on sidequests that RARELY give back any sort of reward (besides drops of exp, but my social stats are permanently damaged so it doesn’t make much of a dent.)
I don’t need anyone to help me die, and that’s all I’m doing here, falling through the air till I hit the ground.