Where am I going?

I have been on this earth just short of 22 years and already I have tried to leave three times. The people that know this all tell me that it’s a good thing, maybe its “ment” to be that I am here. I really don’t think that at all. I really just think that I have not been smart enough this whole time, that I need to make sure it happens for real this time. Yeah sure I have some schooling and people say they like me, but that’s not enough. I don’t like myself. I don’t like where I came from, entire family addicted to Meth, and I certainly don’t like the start it has given me. I see all of these people my age who come from wealthy or stable families who don’t have to worry about buying their own car or worrying about rent or worrying about how they are going to balance bills and school. Instead they all are able to go to school worry free. I don’t feel like I’ll ever be good enough to finish school or even do anything. Even when I recieved my certification I still didn’t and don’t believe I am good enough to work under that certification. I live in a garage, with my boyfriend who I don’t feel even cares about me. I feel stuck with him sometimes. I can’t afford anything on my own and we just bought a car together. If I left this earth I believe I would feel so much better.